Army Girlfriend

my boyfriend left for the army two months ago. i have seen him once since then after a 7 hour journey. I miss him so much and i'm starting to make up reasons to fight with him so it's not so hard when i don't see him.

All my girlfriends are seeing people and it gets really lonely when i'm the one in on my own on a saturday night.

to be honest, i dont see how our relationship can progress properly from here. i'm going to university next year and it will be even harder.

I'm just putting this out there in the hope that people who feel the same will comment and share their stories

shoegal03 shoegal03
18-21, F
40 Responses Dec 9, 2007

Dont fight with him!! He's freaking out just as much as you girl, don't worry. If you want it to work it will bottom line. The army life is not an easy one, but it helps to imagine your future with him, once all the craziness is over. For now, just try and be thankful for the times that you get to talk to him and be supportive because it not only will make him feel better, but it'll make you feel better too. Good luck!

It's a harsh reality. Things do get better over time as he will be able to keep in touch with you. Advice? If you love him and are serious, marriage is the way to go as you will be stationed with him on or off post (BAH housing) which is very accomadating. There are many perks to marriage in military life. Free or close to free housing, free dental, medical, and resources offered by DOD to help you find employment. Hope this helps as I was in the Army too.

Out of nine months together, my soldier and i have only spent about three of those nine months together. We won't see each other for another three months, he is worth the wait. He will come back to me, and if two people want to make it work they will. You will figure it out, it gets lonely but it's possible. Believe me it's possible.

My boyfriend just got dropped off to go to Basic Training today. I'm already missing him like Crazy. Before he left, he left me some of his things...he told me it's so I know without a doubt in my mind that he will be back for me, no matter what. Earlier in the month of october we had a huge fight and we broke up for a week. i realized it was because i was having trouble dealing with how close his ship date was getting to. we got back together because if he shipped out in the middle of us fighting i knew that this relationship wouldn't work...I want it to I'll wait...and deal with the lonliness until he returns...because He is worth the wait.

I'm going through the same thing, stay strong I'm sure he will be back for two weeks for Christmas!

totally,'s worth the wait :( but I'll be sad again when he leaves :(((

I know I think about that too but just relax he probably misses you more than you Miss him because he cant talk to anyone!

Girl, I know how hard a military relationship is, but you have to understand that this is his job. & In the end it is so worth it! If you need to talk about anything I'm here!

I'm definitely in the same boat as you. My boyfriend just got transferred to Fort Bliss. He can talk everyday, but its been a month since I've seen him and it will still be another month until he comes home. I totally understand how you want to pick fights with him, but its not worth it, it just hurts your relationship so much more. Saturday nights suck, especially when he goes out with all his single friends to the bar, and you're the one stuck home, but you learn to get through it.... If your second guessing making it work now, you have to make a decision, is he what you want, or is it not worth it, I know I will never love someone more than I love my boyfriend, so just make sure you know what you want before you hurt him... and the whole college thing, I also know how you feel, I'm moving to Chicago in the fall to go to school and I don't know how long I'll be able to attend there because were planning to get married and he gets deployed sometime this winter. :/ Let me know if you want to talk, just reply! [:

i understand what you are saying, it is hard and i as well am going off to university next year. me and my boyfriend have been together 3 and a half years and this has been the hardest thing i have ever had to go threw but i know it is what makes him happy and i would do anything for him to be happy and be able to see the smile on his face, you also need to do whats best for you, if your not happy you cant keep going on pretending

AWWWWWWW sweetie! i know this post is old but i wanted to say im sorry ur goin through that i know how painful it is! the imporant thing to keep in mind is u will see him! the ONLY thing ur missin out on by not being single is shallow thing that in the future ull most likely regret.

I am going to college this fall and my fiancee is overseas in iraq. i have 8 years of college ahead of me and he has 4 more years in the military left. we started our relationship in the military and that's all we've known. yes it is hard but you learn to deal. i was the same way abt starting fighting but it makes it easier when you don't. just breathe. learn to find your closest friends and explain to them how you feel. i would be nothing without my soldier and my bestfriend beside me. my bestfriend and i spend nearly 5 days out of the week together and when we're not she's checking on me. that makes it easier. surround yourself with positive people. just don't give up. they need us as bad as america needs them. just remember to breathe.

Hey I'm new to this site and I am feeling the exact same way. It hard I live in florida and everything is so spread out and everyone lives so far away from me and ALL my friends are in a relationship too so i'll be stuck alone.. it sucks but it's not worth to fight him if you love him just enjoy the moments that you talk dont take that for granted. So many people go through this and make it. Don't be discouraged just remember you have something special thats worth the fight cuz its not permanent! Just try and keep busy with little things to distract you. Hang in there!

I feel you about going to college next year ! Im doing the same, and we dont even know if hell be stationed near me :/ But starting fights is no bueno, trust me. Just be happy for him, and strong for him whenever y'all get to talk <3

i get ya.I was gonna actually have a talk with my bf about where he sees this going.I ended up not having that talk because if he had any doubts he would have brought somthing up to me.Hes in south carolina and im in illinois,he goes to arizona in about a month.i plan trips to see him even though I will be going to college.I love him enough to give this all a try.<br />
my friends are supportive but they dont get what its like to have a bf in the army.its hard to talk to those who dont know what its like.<br />
whenever i see a couple all hugging and kissing i get down because I would give anything to just hold my bf hand and know hes there by my side.<br />
its not gonna be easy for you,i wont lie.your gonna think about if being together is the right thing but just think of the times with him and how you felt just need to think of any time you were with him and how that felt.ask yourself then,do i want to let that feeling go? stay positive.dont let go,dont give up.he will need you.

Im going through a similar situation. I dated joe back in feb and we stoppd seeing each becuase he wanted to get his life back together. So we stopped talking to each other up until his birthday aug 16 th, when sent him birthday wishes. From feb until aug there wasnt a moment that i didnt think about him or what would have happend if we stayed together. It was like fate for us to be together again after so loong and since then we've hit it off. I completly feel for him and he has for me but hes leaving oct 21 for basic :(. Hes questionable about our relationship becuase he will be gone for so long. i couldn't imagein my life with anyone else, and feels the same way. What do I do?

My boyfriend just got deployed to Egypt. He left on the plane 3 hours ago and I'm already going crazy. He comes back in 10 months. Which isn't bad, but of course being a girl sucks, because you start feeling lonely. But we will all make it! It's worth it! =D

omg! i no how you feel. my boyfriend went to bootcamp almost 4 months ago. i havent seen him since then. i hear from him sometimes but for a short time. i dont see how its going to work with me here and him there. its like i dont have a boyfriend. im always alone when everyone it out with there guys. its so hard!

omg! i no how you feel. my boyfriend went to bootcamp almost 4 months ago. i havent seen him since then. i hear from him sometimes but for a short time. i dont see how its going to work with me here and him there. its like i dont have a boyfriend. im always alone when everyone it out with there guys. its so hard!

so i am having that same problem my friends all want me to go out and have fun.....but theres only so much i can do you know...i mean right now im lucky enough he has his phone but hes also 6 hours behind me i often find myself making up things to fight about

Honestly..<br />
The "military girlfriend" role isnt for every one..<br />
I wanna be like everyone else and say "dont give up" and everything but in the end it sounds as if you have already made up your mind... in a way...<br />
By that I mean if you were REALLY drawn to him, yeah its tough, but you rather fight than say "I don't think I can do it"..<br />
<br />
In the end you really need to do whats best for the both of you. You arent the first and certainly not the last. Its just one of those things you have to power through. Just because of distance and your going to school, babe thats the story of most of our lives.. mine at least.. Some of these ladies are forced to raise kids on their own but they manage..<br />
So as they say, strength behind the strong.. <br />
If you want it dear, you can do it. TRUST.<br />
If you dont, then well like I said, you already know your own answer.

hey, everything will work out. it takes effort and trust. i have been away from him since november its now august. i have 25 days till i see him for the first time in 10 months. i know that sometimes you feel like the third wheel, it happens to me all the time. just use this to become independant and really find yourself. read books, get a dog and find comfort in your friends. you will find the strength to "carry on". my best wishes to you and all of you guys

i am in the exact same boat. i am going to college in the fall and i have another 42 days till i see him again, but that is only for a day. the hardest part has to be not knowing if i will hear from him, if he has sent me mail, if he is okay.

girl listen.. im an army girlfriend.. im only 17 but thats okay.. i know what love it. not everyone is made to be a soldiers girlfriend.. or wife. it is hard.. ive gone now 10days without him... and its getten eaiser and eaiser by the minute cause i know.. each minute/day/hour/week gone.... just makes it that much closer till ill be in his arms again :) its gonna be hard.. your gonna wanna give up but its not worth it.. not everygirl.. can and will sit back and wait.. knowning it could be weeks/months/and maybe even a year before you talk to him or see him again.. not every girl can sit back and be the strong one.. the one who gives the support and not everygirl can sit back knowing they can get the MIA call.. or even the death call. its hard being an army wife/ army girlfriend but its a big deal!!! you have to remember.. hes serving the country you life in.. and he's not doing it alone.. he's got someone back at home giving his support.. giving him the reason to fight... its not just him babe, its you too. :) yah... you'll be sad to see couples.. but.. its worth the wait. only true love can face deployment u can email me at if you need to talk ill be here :)

i feel ya.. my boyfriend left only a month ago, & it's been by far the hardest month of my life. All my friends are so tied up in their boyfriends & when i go out with them i'm always the third wheel.. it's so hard for me. But i hope after boot camp it'll become easier. If you want you can email me & we can talk more

Hey Girls! My boyfriend left for basic training a month ago. It is very reassuring to read all of your posts for I think we all have felt/are feeling the same way as you are feeling!<br />
<br />
Although I am going thru the same thing the way I am handling this is by keeping myself occupied or hanging out with my girls. Although it really stinks...its a great feeling when you receive a letter/phone call. Try to treasure those moments and (as I've heard from many people) it does get better! <br />
<br />
If you ever need to vent you can also email me as well!! It will all be okay! :0)

I am an Army girlfriend and my boyfriend leaves for Army basic training at Ft. Bragg on june 4th. Then from Ft. Bragg he is going to Arkansas for his Air Traffic Control Schooling. How long that will be i don't know. It is hard for me . People don't understand that i feel scared and worried about him constantly

i'm really new to this site, but i just wanted to say hold strong. i dont know if your boy is still gone, but mine is. i know its incredibly hard but it gets better. and when you do see him, it makes you love him even more. and when you get those 3 minute phone calls, remember that he could have called anyone, and he decided to call you. think of the small things, they make the distance seem smaller. good luck!

i totally understand what u r going through its normal. when they r away its so hard and ur mind is going to run away sometimes. talking to or comapring ur relationship with some1 not in the millitary is never a good idea these girls simply dont understand<br />
u gotta b positive bc u know if he was home he woould b spending time with u try to find a hobby that u can share together. my bf n i took an interest in the constellations and when i do get to talk to him we try to fnd them together on the phone or in letters and it makes that distance seem a little shorter.<br />
never give up he is doing something amazing that few have the heart to do. b proud and support him<br />
<br />
he needs u more than u know<br />
i hope it works out :)

I completely know how you feel but he won't be gone forever. And it's going to be hard for him to come home. Civilian life is completely different from military life. It's a huge shock to the system. Hang in there girl you can do it.

dont give up i know that you feel like no one understands what you are going through. i know that it hurts to be away from him. im away from mine and i wish that i can feel his arms around me and hold me like he does. but you will see him again and that day will be the greatest day of your life. stay in contact with him and let him know you will always be there for him

dont give up i know its hard ive been an army fiancee for about 6 months and it was hard at first but it will get easier i promise you

Stay strong hunnie xoxo

hey, please dont give up.<br />
Sometimes it feels as though your completly alone and noone else can understand the pain you feel when your away from him.<br />
You might not be happy with the situation at the moment but the feeling that cant possibly be described when u see him again by far outways how down u feel at the moment. Just stay strong, keep busy, arrange girlie nights and keep in tuch with him and I promise ull be fine xxx

Hang in there girl im not a army girlfriend im a marine wife and my husband has been deployed two months after we got married our whole first year of marriage and the last two years of our relationship have been spent in seperate states it doesnt get easier but if its ment to be it will find a way it may feel like ur all alone but truley ur not there are many wives from all branches going through the same thing ur going through it will all work out in the end just keep ur head up and stay busy it will pass soon enough

i know how you feel, it may seem hard at the moment but i bet that when he gets back that he missed you every day, every hour, every minute, every second and you guys will be as close as ever when he gets back so don't give up :)

my husband is in the army and it took a long while to get used to, but now i would not have it any other way him being away keeps our love alive and you can keep in contact via emails and phone calls. it is worse when they first join but it does get better i promise they say it takes a special kind of woman to be a squaddie wife gf hang in there and good luck x

Then you'd better vote for Obama so your man can come home alive and well, and soon.

Hey hang in there. My husband and I were just dateing when he left for his first tour in Iraq. I understand what you are feeling. We got through by emailing and IMing. Phone calls were hard to come by in 2004 over there. Remember the good times. Its just as hard on them being gone eventhough they are usually so busy they cannot thing about anything. Just support your man and if ya need to vent and talk I am here.

Hey:) My name is Erin and I know the feeling well... My boyfriend of 4 years joined the army after he graduated college last year... It was quite the jolt, since we're both young (he's 26 I'm 22) and we'd been together for so long, I find it hard to deal with him just up and leaving me...<br />
He was gone for a full 6 months of basic training and OCS... About two-thirds of the way through it, we had a week that I picked a fight each time we spoke...<br />
It broke my heart because I knew I didn't WaNt to fight with him...<br />
Where is your boyfriend?

Don't give up! I know exactly how you feel my b/f left for basic in April and its been very hard but it does get easier..just try not to fight and don't worry about everyone going out on Saturdays, go out with a group of girls every once in awhile and have fun that way! And as for going off to college (I'm going through the exact same thing here too) just remember that you wouldn't see him every day while you were at college anyway and that he is worth the wait! And remember we are all here for you to talk to!

i really like ur advice! its soo true!

yes it's hard to be alone. but if your meant to be then you'll get through it. i'm going through the same thing but i know that i wouldn't change it for the world because i love this man and he's the only one for me. you just need a good support group of people who know what your going through, it really helps. i'm here if ya need me

I know how you feel staying in while all your friends go out! Or even, going out and still feeling alone!<br />
Hang in there!<br />
If what you have is meaningful, it's worth anything you will go through.<br />
How can one fun night match a lifetime of true love?<br />
Your relationship will develop, but on a different track than most people experience. It's full of rough times, but you'll have the most powerful high times ever! I promise!<br />
I've only been an army girlfriend for about five months, but I can tell you... I rarely look back. Send me an e-mail if you need any help! Take care!

helllppp meee