as bad as this may seem this website is becoming my place to unload haha! ive had so much on my mind with no where to let it go and just relax. can i just say that i absolutely love planning my wedding. knowing that in 129 days im going to be the luckiest girl in this world. i honestly play the wedding over and over in my head allllll the time. our first danc.e.. our first kiss as husband and wife.. the butterflies when im walking down the isle hoping i look stunning for him. im just so excited. sometimes it hurts with how much i miss him. is there still days when your girls just sit at home and still cry?? even though theyve been gone for awhile. honestly, im getting use to him not being here.. which sucks because i want him here so bad. but my own family doesnt even know there are times when i still cry. even last night when i was talking to him i cried.. i hid it pretty dang well haha. i really shouldnt be whinning about all of this because i know there are people who have it way worse then me. and im so blessed to have someone care for me so deeply and love me the way alex does. i dont deserve such an amazing person. i dont know how im going to handle deployment.. i honestly might go insane.atleast with him in germany im able to talk to him everyday. deployment scares me. when the subject comes up its enough to bring me down for awhile. im going to end on that note.. i dont like thinking about it. i think this calls for some laundry time. how are all of you other army gfs/fiance/wifes doin out there??
melissagraham melissagraham
18-21, F
2 Responses Aug 12, 2010

I cried a bit today as well. I was watching a show and it had this scene where this soldier comes home and everyone is so happy and I just started bawling. It's always okay cry every now and then. My boyfriend is deployed in Afghanistan and I haven't heard from him in a few days and I'm just getting used to being by myself for the past two months. It makes you feel better when you let it out and get it over with and move on :).

Had a good cry this morning actually, so you're not alone. i'm also getting used to my guy being so far away (he's deployed in iraq right now, and I've been with him since the end of his basic) and i still have the occasional cry. but i feel better after it so don't be afriad to let it out.