Our Story..1st Deployment For Me 3rd For Him...im Havin A Hard Time..need Advice

         I met my hero  Zach  3 1/2 years ago through a friend. I had just turned 18 and was a senior in high school and he was  22 in the army stationed at Fort Sill in Lawton Oklahoma.  We hit it off immediately and would hang out every time he would go visit his parents who lived 3 hours away from him but only 20 mins from me. He had a gf at the time  so we just became very good friends and nothing else. We had so much fun when we would hang out, never a dull moment and he made me feel so comfortable being around him. I used to be very shy so that was a big deal! I  graduated in 08 and moved away to go to college. We kept in contact with each other and would text and call each other frequently. I was in school and working for awhile til I decided to screw up and move to texas with my pos boyfriend at the time. We ended up not working out and 2 months after I moved there I ended up finding out I was pregnant  and decided to move back to oklahoma a month later to be closer to family. Me and my ex broke things off and We havent spoken since I found out . I started talking to Zach when I got back and we decided that we needed to go out on a date so we did . We went out to dinner and a movie and had an amazing time.He was the only person besides me who ever touched my belly while I was pregnant :) a few days after our date he was on his way to Germany where he was going to be staioned at. I was sad and upset that he was leaving but I understood.
           We talked as much as we could and he eventually asked me to be his girlfriend.  I was thrilled! I secretly had been in love with him for so long and always wanted to be with him it just never seemed like good timing  until then. My amazing baby boy was born and then in april 2011  Zach got deployed to Afghanistan. It's been hard but nothing close to how its been this past week. He  arrived home July 30th  for R&R and we had the most amazing 2 weeks ever! He got to meet my 5 month old son for the 1st time and he loves that little boy .  On august 15th he returned to afghanistan to finish another 8 months of deployment. I never imagined how hard it would be to go into the airport with him and leave without him. Im trying my hardest to hold myself together and be strong for him and for us but im not doing such a good job at it. The 2 weeks of R&R just made it worse. I cant sleep, or eat or get my mind off of it and I know that I have to for all 3 of us but im struggling. I try to think of the good times we've had and will have but I cant seem to get the bad thoughts or the things I see on the news out of my head. I go back to school sept 7th & that plus being a mommy i know will keep me busy but I have no military gf-wife friends and I think if I can surround myself around people who are going through what I am than it will help alot !Im so very proud of him and I want him to be proud of me and I know me being strong for him will make him proud. He's my best friend and I know that if the tables were turned he would have my back and be strong for me. I just need some advice on how to get through this so I can be that for him . sorry it was so long, Thank you so much! <3 J
sgtsandersgirl sgtsandersgirl
22-25, F
3 Responses Aug 23, 2011

Its great having him back. He's stationed at Ft carson which is only about an hour and a half drive from me so its not too bad. As far as care packages go blackbetty13 said it wonderfully. I couldn't have said it better. Only thing I'd add is a few sentimental items. Wallet size pictures would be great so he can fit them in the pockets of his acu's. Find out if he has access to computers with CD drives in them so maybe send him music he likes. While my soldier was over all he did in his free time was watch movies and listen to music. Anything that will help keep him entertained in his free time because they have nothing to do over there.

aw im glad u got ur soldier back :) ty for the help

You're doing good so far. Its hard going through that I know. My soldier has been back from afghanistan for a month and a half now and the entire time he was gone I struggled to not think about him all the time. Like everyone keeps telling you just keep yourself busy. If you can skype with him, do it. He'd love to see your face I'm sure. Also send lots of care packages with snacks and pictures. Those 8 months will be gone before you know it. Keep you head up.

thank you :) how is it now that he's back? what kinds of things did u put in your care packages? when I ask him what he wants or needs he cant give me a straight answer lol he says whatever I wanna send him ...so some ideas would be helpful so my packages arent the same ones over and over! thank you so much (:

They like snacks. I sent mine two tubes of pringles, chex mix, packets(not cans) of tuna and chicken (precooked youll see them at the store) Little packets of Gatorade mix they can put in their water. A book, I sent mine a small camping pillow because all he has is a small cot. As for toiletries, baby wipes (or the grown up kind) dental pics, qtips, foot powder, toilet paper, toothpaste, soap, (like small travel sizes and double bag them, anything that can spill, will) You can find lists too. try not to send too many gifts, they can only take so much back on the plane and their gear takes up a lot of it.
I hope this helps.

wow this helped so much! thank you :)

Great story, thanks for sharing it here! It sounds like you will make it through this, and keeping busy is the best way. I have learned which friends I can get support from ,and which I can't. Good Luck to the three of you !

thank you so much :) It's nice talking to people who can understand what im going through ..for once