Hot And Cold

So I don't know what to think at the moment. It has been about a month since I saw my soldier and I think in those few weeks, I have tlaked to him maybe a dozen times. I know this can be a lot sometimes but he is not deployed and I Know he has more time. He seems to be talking to our friends at home more than he does to me and it kind of makes me jealous...I want some love too!

I never know how to take what he says because the only way we communicate is through text messaging. We have had one phone conversation...that went really well and I was so happy for a few days, but then everything went back to normal.

I guess I just don't know if he still feelst the same way about me and I do about him. When we were first apart, he kept talking about being together and our future and what-not, but now it seems like we struggle for small-talk :/

Anyone have any advice for me?
AXiLove AXiLove
22-25, F
4 Responses Aug 26, 2011

Blackbetty that is some really good advice. "have confidence that you're not wrong for wanting more" I'm always lacking confidence there. I'm always scared to ask for more. But that's just me, I rarely think I deserve more. I hope that he's giving me all he can like I am. But who really knows right? That's why we bring it up to them. Heh. Thanks girl

Thanks ladies!! I think I will bring it up to him. It's difficult for me but wish me luck! :P

I know what you mean, Im the type to just take it. Deal with it ya know? but this time is so different, with him I want so badly for everything to be right, I mean i wont over complain, but if something bothers me, I will tell him. Just have confidence that you are not wrong for wanting more, and understand however when there are times that he cant comunicate (those are the times where we DO have to sit and take it) When its not the army thats taking his time, you have a right to ask for it.
Good luck!

I was in the same boat and still am a little bit. He is in Ait.. We text a few times a night, skype every once in awhile, and talk on the phone maybe once a week, if that.. I agree with BlackBetty, you need to confront him and tell him how you are feeling. I told my boyfriend and we have been a lot better ever since! Although we don't talk everyday and every second of that day, he is talking more and acting more of a boyfriend now! You also have to be ok with him talking to his friends, yes you are a bigger part of his life, but, I am sure he likes to catch up with his friends and family as well. It's a lot to go through and to have friends through it all, can mean a lot to him. I had a friend that left for the Army and hadn't received any letters or phone calls from anyone but me and he was heart broken.. He just needs to see where you are coming from though.. he may not even realize that he is doing it!

Tell him that the lack of communication is bothering you. Get straight to the point. Tell him you are the kind of gf that likes to hear from her man everyday that she can. That you want to be a bigger part of his life, that you want to know how his day is going. Do you ever call or text him? or are you just waiting for him? If youre waiting then he may just take it that you arent an everyday talker. <br />
The only way to get past this is to bring it up to him.