...The Army Would Have Issued You One.I understand, this is the Army..."if the Army wanted you to have a family, you would have been issued one." But here we all are. Love can't be issued, it just happens!
This man is absolutely the most wonderful person in the world. I never knew someone could respect me or treat me so kindly and love me so much. Not because I lead a sheltered life but rather the very opposite. For a long time I believed I would never fall in love with someone who could love me back as fiercely as I did him, and he goes above and beyond that always. He never ceases to surprise me! I love him more than words could ever say.
They say when you marry the man, you marry the soldier. His enlistment and beginning of service has been a crazy emotional roller coaster for me. There are times when I am so scared that I can't stop crying, or I refuse to cry and let it well up. Like when he has to leave me or when I think about the many uncertainties the future holds. There are times when I am so unbelievably happy that I might have a heart attack. Like when he comes home and everything must be just perfect. Or when I get the mail and there's a letter from him. Then there's times where for some reason I am frozen with all kinds of feelings, a head full of words, but I just can't put them down in a letter or open my mouth when on the phone with him for the first time in months. Again, this has been a relentless emotional ride for me, but I can't wait to spend the rest of my life like this...alive and passionate.
It is a sincerely beautiful thing being a part of the Army. But not in the sense of peaches n' cream and rose petals beautiful. there's certainly nothing "beautiful" about the uncertainty of your other half's safety. The uncertainty of constant relocation's. The uncertainty of, well, anything! What is there that's pretty about aging well beyond your years with your heart laid out solely. eternally, and completely for your soldier? There's nothing beautiful about a person struggling to manage a house, family, or finances, etc. without their best friend. There's nothing glamorous about being geographically "single". There's nothing beautiful about rolling over in bed and wrapping your arms around air because instead of soothingly snoring away beside you (yes, when you've been separated so long, his snoring is soothing!), he's thousands of miles away in a crude bunk or tent. There's nothing peachy about picking up your phone to call him and realizing you can't, then getting that ache in your chest because you so desperately miss his voice.
But it is beautiful in a bittersweet way. I feel the words "Army Strong" not only describe our Soldiers, but us Army wives, fiancees, girlfriends, friends, parents, and countless others who daily and actively support the Soldiers! It takes a different kind of strength, will, and determination to be a soldier. It takes that from the girls at home too. I love my boyfriend so immensely much. I'll never stop. The Army serves now to display even more prominently what a wonderful, strong, kind, honest, and amazing person he is! And I doubt I'm the only or the last one to feel like this about their Army man! I am proud (and grateful!) to be an American. I'm proud to be an Army girlfriend. And I am proud to be his.