Lost And Confused

After the whole fight the other day and saying goodbye and havent talked since.  I got a phone call this morning from him but I could not bring myself to answer it.  It has been a couple days since we talked and I did not know what to do.  I decided not to answer to see if he left a voicemail which he did.  So i listened to his voicemail. He said how much that he missed me and that are fighting is mainly because we miss each other cause we just saw each other.  That he knows he needs to change that he wants to be with me forever especailly after his army life.  He asked if he was to call again tonight if we could just sit and talk with no fighting or yelling.  I already mailed him back pretty much all of his stuff though.  I dont know what to do. Do i answer tonight and just sit and talk?  Do i not answer and still be done with it all?  I cant just jump back intoa relationship with him. He has to show me that he can treat me right and not lie..As well as show that he can handle things and that im more important then a truck.  It will take him a long time to prove it all..Should i give him the chance? I am so confused on what to do.

armygf11 armygf11
26-30, F
3 Responses Mar 4, 2010

Thank you all for the help. I am not to sure of what i am going to do. But he has months to prove that i can trust him again..he wont be back in my life for awhile.

I am not too familiar with the situation, but just from the couple of posts that I've read, it sounds like a pretty dificult situation. I am sorry you are going through it. i'd just like to put my two cents in to say that if you do what to work on your relationship, that it might be better to take him being in the military right now as an opportunity to focus on yourselves and to grow, and to see how you both feel when he is out. It's always hard to mend a relationship, and I'd imagine it's even harder to mend when there are other circumstances, like the military to deal with. It takes time and commitment to work on it, and I don't think that is something he can reasonably do without being home.

First of all, do you think you can trust him again? If not, then I would not bother. Second of all, do you think he can change? And I am not talking about changing for a couple weeks before going right back to what he was doing beforehand. You are the only one who can answer those questions since you know the whole story. I guess I would also ask yourself what the harm in the call could be? If you feel like he is just playing a game, and allowing him to talk would just mess with your head, then maybe a call is not worth it. I would also, if you do talk, maybe try and explain that he is not going to get you back easily, that he must earn your trust. He might not like it, but perhaps if you explain just how hurt you are, he will understand. All I have to caution you on is my roommate and her bf fought all the time, and they would come to blows, and then "fix" whatever was wrong, be good for about two weeks, then go back to being toxic for eachother. I guess what I am trying to say is, if you do talk to him tonight, approach him with kid gloves. He needs to earn his place back in your life, and if he isn't willing to do it, then he isn't worth your time. I hope this helps, and good luck in whatever you do choose to do. Remember you DESERVE a guy who will treat you way better than he has been previously