My Boyfriend Recently Enlisted... Not Sure What To Think, Need Some Help

Hi i am new to this group but it sounds like it could really help me. My boyfriend of a year and a half has recently decided to join the army and he just enlisted last week. He is leaving for basic training on July 6th. This came as a really big surprise to me.... i never thought that he would join the military or that i would ever be a military girlfriend. I was so upset when he told me he wanted to join because i know how dangerous it is and i knew we would be apart for very long periods of time. But over time i have come to realize that despite the fact that i really really don't want him to join, i need to support him because i love him more than anything and he really needs my support. And even though i'm not exactly happy about his choice, i am very proud of him because it takes a special kind of guy to do something so brave.

I can't imagine myself being with anybody else and i know that he is the one. I know he loves me and that he is doing this to help secure a future for both him and myself. I know a year and a half may not sound like a long time but we love each other so much and we have talked of marriage and kids and everything like that. I want to wait for him and be here for him when he comes back, but i know that that is going to be extremely hard. We are very close and see each other almost every day. I am very dependent on him (not money wise or anything like that but emotionally and mentally) and im not sure how i will be able to handle being apart from him for so long.

I also have many concerns about him cheating on me while he is away. He is not the kind of guy to cheat but who knows what will happen if we are so far apart for so long. And i would have no way of knowing if he did cheat. It is just these kind of thoughts that have me worried and stressed about him leaving. Not to mention how dangerous the military is. I can't bear the thought of him getting hurt or even killed. I would be devastated.

If anyone has any input or suggestions that could help me out that would be awesome and i would greatly appreciate any supportive comments anyone has.

ilovemyarmyhero ilovemyarmyhero
18-21, F
2 Responses Apr 6, 2010

you have to know that you can be strong and be there to support your man while he goes through this, he needs you just as much as you need him and you've gotta remember that. they have good and bad days just like you will back home, but if you really love him it will all be worth it and worth waiting for him. the distance just strengthens your relationship and if you can make it through that you will feel like you can make it through anything! just enjoy the time he has left and make alot of memories that will get you through the times when he is gone. also dont even put the thought of cheating in your head or it will end up consuming your thoughts. i dont even think about my guy doing that at all he told me that he never would and i will trust him. you just can't think like that and everything will work out in the end. i wish you guys good luck & if you ever need to talk feel free to msg me :)

First off, if your going to be in any long distance relationship, be it military or civilian relationship you have to have trust that they wont cheat, and not even put the thought of them cheating into your head, it will upset you, and without trust you cant have a relationship, long distance can work if your willing to make it work, plus him being in basic doesnt really have time to cheat lol, unless hes writing some other chick lettters, i know my bf is in Fort Knox, and there arent any girls where he is training at, but regardless just dont even put the thought of them cheating into your head, its a bad road to go down, and enjoy the months you have left with him, make the most of it, you still have time with him before he goes :) so dont frown right now, frown when hes gone, cry when hes gone, give him a smile and encouragement, no matter how hard it may be, i know the last day my bf was here i broke down in tears at a restaurant we usually go to, its hard to hold yourself together when you know everything about your life with them is going to change, but the one thing i do know now is that im stronger, with weeks and time apart, the only thing that strengthens is the bond between jake and i, just do your best to stay strong, and enjoy and make memories cus memories really hold you over the months apart.