If I Can Help

I am speechless, i cant imagine him being deployed for 3 times although im sure it will happend. Thank you... Im sorry that he is gone. Im here if you need to talk. Im glad there is someone to the site that will give advice when we need it even though its hard too. take care and stay strong!!

Wow......

Well I have to say I have not met an officers wife like you. No disrespect but the officers wives that I know have that rank on there arm. You can guess I am an enlisted wife. So if you dont mind me askin where are yall stationed? Do you have any little ones? I have two little boys ages 2 and 8 months. My hubby is now in AZ reclassing he was an 11B. The day he graduates is going to be such a sad but happy day. He is giving up his blue cord and his unit association. So is there anything about you that you wouldnt mind sharing? Thank you for being the person you are.

Anyone here can ask me anything. My husband has rank not me. I could care less rank ,enlisted,mos means nothing to me. A soldier is a soldier. I will talk all day with a soldier who has nothing but velcro on his uniform before I breathe a word to a Colonel or an Officers wife. Yes we are few and far between. We are stationed on lovely Fort Hood in Texas. I must say it has been the worst command experience ever. This is like I said our third 12 month deployment. We have a 12 year old daughter, 2 dogs and I have 180 parents whom I email everyday letting them know every detail of their soldiers life. 48% of our soldiers are single so someone somewhere loves them so it has been my journey to seek those families out. Yes they were horrified when I called because they think their soldier is in trouble. the first thing I say is he's not in trouble. You do not have to tell me how Officers wives are trust me I have shot down many an invitation for coffee or tea. I don't drink either and if I did if not everyone can go then I don't go. I think it is sometimes how you were raised I am from georgia so I am a southern backwoods woman with a strong accent and voice. I have worked my whole life and depend on no one for anything. My mother raised me and my brother scraping by so I know what it is to be without. I grew up having not enough, our lights turned off, our water turned off. If these officers wives were raised the same way I was they may be a little different. I will never forget where I came from.

That is so true.. Never forget where you come from. I wish more officers wives would think like that.

I just want to say thank you. I just found this site and it's already making me feel more sane. I am also an officers wife, but this is our first deployment (he was non-deployable at Ft. Polk for a few years.....crappy place, but at least we were together). I don't have any kids and no family in Louisiana so I moved back home to live with my mother in NY. None of my family or friends "gets it". They keep telling me to just make the best of it...but nothing is the best without my husband.

I have also found that tylenol pm is my bff....also or a more natural approach melatonin is nice. I don't tell him when I'm upset, but that's probably the hardest part....he's my best friend and I'm used to telling him everything, but you're right it just makes his job harder (if that's possible).

Thanks again for you comments

My husband was deployed ones so far, Iraq, 6 months...
It was a hell for me, but i knew i had to be strong for him, i was crying every single night, stopped reading newspapers, watching news.
Next year may is next time when he might go again.

Thank you for your story. My son is going to join the Army next month. This gives me an insight to how both my son and daughter in law may feel.

I was an officers wife and an officer - now retired - Navy. We were both in the medical corps, so that has an influence on my comments. My husband was deployed on operational tours during our time in the Navy. Please don't isolate yourself, by stereotyping officers wives or enlisted wives. During one of my husband's deployments I was in Japan with two small children and often had to go back to the hospital to care for patients. Life would have been very difficult without the other officers wives. There were some who didn't approve of my other friends - junior officers wives and enlisted wives - but more who were able to be my friends. You will find that there are people who will support you and appreciate your support among the officers wives. Some of the women you reject or feel rejected by are suffering as much or more than you are. The negative energy directed at the group harms everyone, but most of all the one holding the anger. At least some of the anger belongs to the ones taking our loved ones away from us and putting them in harm's way. You will find as I did that there is a wide range of personality types among both the officer and enlisted wives. Bless you all and bless the loved ones who are parted from you.

Being a defence force wife/partner is certainly not for everyone. I was with a navy boy and that was tough. There is always uncertainty, you never really know how long you are going to have them home for. It is tough on the guys too. I have to say they do an extraordinary job defending our country. And even though I am no longer the partner of a navy boy I still spare a thought for those women and families who support these guys and are left behind time and time again. Good Luck to you girls.