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Scared

I have been in an abusive realationship for so many years. It started when i was about 18 well that s the first time i can remember him hitting me. He punched me in the stomache i thought i was going to die i couldnt breath. Hes so cruel he really frightens me he controls me all the time  we dont actually live together i am not in a realationship with him yet he phones me all the time he shouts at me belittles me, im so scared of him when i tell him that he just laughs hes say i mad he said he was going to slit my throat the other day when i asked him why he said that he said that he never said anything hes   a lies all the time he accuses me of having affairs. i have not been in arealationship with this man for months yet he still feels he has the right that he can do anything he wants to me. yesterday he forced me down on the kitchen floor pinned arms down then pulled up my nighty and touched my breast i started to cry then hes gets angry and asked me why im crying. he just wont leave me alone he says hes going to make my life hell and he is. i have two children from this man 1 lives away the other lives at home. he does alot of things when nobodies around  so i have no proof.i  know what to do im so afraid that he is going to kill me the only good thing that if he killed me is that i would never have to see his face again. i feel such a fool i hate myself for letting this man control me i look at myself i hate myself i feel ugly, worthless.
diamondwhite diamondwhite 41-45 3 Responses Jun 27, 2011

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I was a victim of Domestic Violence and the best thing I did for myself and my kids was get out, change the scare that you feel and turn that into anger if that what it takes for you to get the hell out of that relationship. That behavior is totally unacceptable and should not be tolerated by no one. You better start thinking about that child that is living with you, you are teaching that child how to be weak by not getting out that situation. Your showing your child that you do not love them, cause your not protecting them from this abuse. You are your childs example. Teach your child what you do in the event that you are harrassed you can go to safe horizon dail info get telephone numbers to assist you they have help out there reach for it, teach your child correctly how to help them selves if they are in this situation. It's called problem solving skills. Obviously you picked a lemon for a partner and you probably didn't recognize the red flags while they was waving in your face, he must've shown you some signs of his behavior that was distructive or not normal. And if this is what your parents showed you then my dear break that dam chain and change the cycle. You let this man break you down. Maybe you need to watch Jennifer Lopez movie ENOUGH just to pysc your self up, what ever it takes but get the hell out. What if this man harms your own child? Don't be stuck on Stupid sorry But you need to wake up. And if your gonna lash out on me for saying that, then that's the same feeling you should have when this man gets stupid with you, stand up for yourself.

These guys only understand fear ... find out what or whohe's truly afraid of and use it against him.<br /><br />
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For legal advice, awaren98 seems on top of it. :)

You are not ugly and worthless. He sounds ugly and worthless. You do not deserve to live this way. You need to get away from him as soon as possible. I'm going to give you the national number for domestic abuse and their website. They can help you get away from this abusive man. There is a better way for you and your child to live. You just have to take that first brave step to ask for help and let someone help you. <br />
Think of yourself and your child saftey.<br />
DV hotline 1-800-799-7233 , DV website www.ndvh.org<br />
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Please get help, and live the life you deserve.<br />
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You can email me whenever you like, I'm a advocate for Domestic Violence and Rape, I will help you anyway I can.<br />
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Angela