I have been in an abusive realationship for so many years. It started when i was about 18 well that s the first time i can remember him hitting me. He punched me in the stomache i thought i was going to die i couldnt breath. Hes so cruel he really frightens me he controls me all the time we dont actually live together i am not in a realationship with him yet he phones me all the time he shouts at me belittles me, im so scared of him when i tell him that he just laughs hes say i mad he said he was going to slit my throat the other day when i asked him why he said that he said that he never said anything hes a lies all the time he accuses me of having affairs. i have not been in arealationship with this man for months yet he still feels he has the right that he can do anything he wants to me. yesterday he forced me down on the kitchen floor pinned arms down then pulled up my nighty and touched my breast i started to cry then hes gets angry and asked me why im crying. he just wont leave me alone he says hes going to make my life hell and he is. i have two children from this man 1 lives away the other lives at home. he does alot of things when nobodies around so i have no proof.i know what to do im so afraid that he is going to kill me the only good thing that if he killed me is that i would never have to see his face again. i feel such a fool i hate myself for letting this man control me i look at myself i hate myself i feel ugly, worthless.