Too Long

My ex-husband threatend to kill himself several times when we were married and he was abusing me. It's a manipulative tactic pure and simple. What finally pushed me over the edge and made me decide to leave was the affects is was having on my children. I am so much happier not having to worry every time I come home whether it will be a 'good night' or not. I have never regretted my decision to leave, only that I did not do it sooner.

This is a sever case of domestic abuse. Physical, emotional, mentally, and jelous behaviors. It's no way for you and your children to live. He will never change, and if you take him back he will only get worse. He will start to isolate you to prevent you from leaving or making him leave.



My advice would be to stay away from him, get a restraining order so he can't come near you or the kids, call around to see if they have domestic abuse groups you can attend, therapy for you and your children. Most communites have resources avalible for you, I would find out what they are and how they can help.



Get familar with Domestic abuse, knowledge is power, the more you know about the less likley you will go back into the relationship. I'm going to give you the web site on domestic violence and the national phone number so maybe they can find you some resources in your area.



National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233

Web Site : www.ndvh.org.



Most men threaten to kill themselves as a way to prevent you from leaving them, they never follow through, it's only a scare tactic they use, another way to manipulate you.



You are strong and capible of living a life without abuse, fear, and insults. Both you and your children deserve to live a happing loving life.



Good Luck to you, I wish you and your children the best. May you all heal and live happy.



Angela

thank you for your comment.



He has left the house. He is not coming back to live here. When he comes back from his shift away at work he will be staying somewhere else.

The reason I called police this time and not others( and there have been many) was because he was attacking my son. For some time he has seemed to be very jealous of my son and the relationship I have with him. He calls him 'Your Prince.' and compares himself to my son regularly. Things such as' why can he(my son) play playstation for hours, but I can't'. Obviously I expect different behaviour from my husband to my son. But my husband just doesn't seem to get it. He tells me he loves me and the kids, but abuses us, calls us names, and only ever wants to sit and play his video games for hours on end.

Hi Tellmehere, I am deeply sadden by your story. Everyone is probably going to tell you to leave. I will not tell you that; you need to make that choice for yourself.

What I will ask you is the following:

What did your children do to deserve to be in a situation like this?

Do you love your children?

Would your children stay if they could leave and know they would be provided for?

Do you want your children to suffer daily for your choices?

Do you want your children to grow up believing that this is what you do to the one's you love?

If you choose not to leave, to stay in the marriage, PLEASE give your children up; give them a safe place to live where they can be loved and protected. If you cannot love and protect them because you are too ill, please let them go.

They will understand when they are grown, they will not understand if you make them stay in your hell. They will grow up to hate you, and maybe end up being abusive just like their father. Or God forbid, you all may end up dead; or worse one of your children will end up dead by his hands and you will live.

If I read it correctly, your oldest son is being abused by a man that isn't even his father.

Please for the sake of the children; free them from the pain and struggle that you choose to live in; they can't make that choice for themselves.

I am sorry that you are caught up in the cycle of abuse, and I pray that you get help.

Thank you for having the courage to share your story.

Take care of yourself, and remember: You can't love anyone unless you love yourself first. You are the one your children look to for protection; please provide that for them.