Oh, November. You Started It All.

His name was Brenden. I thought he was amazing. he was a rocker, metalhead that could play the guitar like no bodies buisness. I fell for him so fast and so hard. In march of my senior year, my mom decided that she was going to move my sister and I along with herself out to texas. And there she would finalize the divorce with my father. I didnt want to leave. I was a few months away from graduating on honor roll, attendance and accedemic. I had a job, great friends, and Brenden. We left colorado on march 31st. We got to texas the next day. I was pulled out of school, unable to graduate with my class. she promised to put me back in school in texas so i could get my diploma, but the credit system was so different they wanted to start me over as a junior. So, needless to say.. it just didnt happen. In june, I tured 18. I had been working at a sonic drive in as a car hop and saving my money. I savend up enough money to get me back to colorado. I wanted to be with Brenden. I drove straight through from dallas to denver in one day. I got to my destination at 9:30 pm. I knocked on the door of my best friends house (his name is Stevie) and saw him and my boyfriend standing there. The both grabbed me and hugged me. I saw tears welling up in brendens eyes. I was so happy i was finally back home. I lived with stevie and brenden in an apartment for a few months. After that Brenden and I moved in with his dad and his sister. Things were going great. I was working as a florist, Brenden was still looking for a job. but we were trying to get on our feet together. The morning after halloween, November 1st. Brendens dad shot him self in the parking garage at the mall. Brenden had already lost his mom 3 years prior from breast cancer. And now his father was gone. I struggled trying to keep Brenden stable. His emotions were all over the place. And on top of that we were now having to pack up the house and downsize to a smaller appartment for the two of us. His younger sister went to live with their uncle, and we moved into our own place. Well, right after his dad died, Brenden started using. He started smoking methamphetemines. i was sompletely unaware for the first month or so. He tried to hide it from me. He i began to catch on. And when i did, things went too far downhill. He started abusing me. It started out small. He would shove me or throw me down and that was it. But I stayed with him. I made the excuse that it was just the drugs, and hes angry about his dad.. But i stayed with him hoping it would get better. It only got worse. I started showing up to work with bruises covering my arms and chest. sometimes on my neck from where his hands had choked me. People, and co-workers began to notice all of these markings, and that i had been acting differently. I wasnt social anymore, i was always depressed and quiet. I was constantly late for work, and i am never late. WEll a few days before valentines day, i woke up on the couch in our living room. I walked into our bedroom and saw him in bed with one of my friends. When i walked in, the girl jumped up and left. I was enraged. I walked over to him and shook him to wake him up. i asked him why she was in our bed. The second i said that he flipped and i had no time to react. He began to strangle me, i tried to hit him and push him off but i couldnt breathe. He let go and i tried to crawl away from him, and then he hit me over the head with somthing. I am not sure what it was but it almost knocked me out. but my adrenaline kept me gonig. I was dizzy for a minute, but then i came to and he was on top of me trying to choke me again. i got his arms away from my neck. But i wasnt fast enough. He headbutted me un the face, right next to my temple. And he bit my face so hard i almost bled. I was screaming for help. I had been the entire time i could. But he wouldnt stop. Our dog was barking at him trying to protect me. Se he said he was gonig to kill the dog to shut it up. He got a knife and came back to the bedroom. I began screaming louder and STILL no one came. As i screamed he came at me to shut me up. Still with the knife in his hand. i tried to block him and he stabbed me in the arm. In my panic i didnt even really notice this. after that he sat there calm. complaining about what he had done, appologizing profusly. Saying that he was a peice of ****. This was my window. I told him it was ok. and i asked him if i could borrow the car just to go calm down for an hour. He didnt wat me to because he was afraid i wouldnt come back. well i finally talked him into letting me leave. and i ran out of the apartment. crying my eyes out. I was happy that i was alive and breathing and way from him. i took off in the car and drove to my old high school. I went in to talk to my old counselor. She used to specialize in battered women. I told her everything. and she called the police for me. The came took picture of my markings and wounds. Checked me for a concussion. then took me down to the station so i could make my statement. He was arrested later that night when they found him. On valentines day, I had to testify in court. He pled guilty to 1st degree assault and 3rd degree Menacing with a weapon. He was released from jail a few days later, but slapped with 2 years probabtion and a restraining/protective order from me. He violated the protection order twice now. He has currently been in jail since january his release date is july 1st.. I moved back to texas. And i have been very happy. Our restraining order ended on may 6th. They will not allow me to file for a new one. They say he has to "do something" in order for me to get a new one. so in other words.. wait untill its too late. But i have been steadily working. its been a year since it happened. I have a new amazing boyfriend/fiance. Hes my marine. I know he will protect me. But i still have this constant fear. I know he will get out. And i know he will find me. No matter how far away i run.
Inkdblondie67 Inkdblondie67
18-21, F
1 Response May 16, 2012

Look I doubt he just started drugs don't feel bad it's always seems like this. An addict who tries to control and has irrational rage. Keep the order and hang in there. He is the creep and deserves the consequences not you. When you get married you could fully change your name and move. I have the same issue fear my wife will come all night so I don't sleep.