I Am Still Alive

i met my daughter's father when i was 15 and fell head over heels for him. when i was 18 i found out i was expecting and we where both so happy. when my daughter samantha was born things could not be better. shortly after coming home from the hospital my boyfriend of 3 years raped me. i did not leave because i lived with him and had no money no car and no where to go. i am now 20 years old and have been away from him for a whole year. i cant count how many times i had black eyes or a broken bone.
chaparrita chaparrita
18-21, F
13 Responses Apr 13, 2007

Well done girl!! You are such an inspiration to me to keep going!! Always strong sweetie, wish you lots of blessings and love!!

I am glad you are still alive to share your story.

Way to go for leaving him. You did a great thing not only for yourself but also for your daughter.

im very glad you had the strength to leave i myself was raped by my husband who till this day says it isnt rape im his wife its my duty, it took me four years to leave. im glad you managed to escape and i hope you can move on with your life

Congrats on getting away! I was raped too by my baby's father, and to this day he says it wasn't rape. I am happy for you and I hope you stay away for good!

I applaud and honor your resilence - staying away this long is a huge achievement and it WILL get easier. The worst thing about abuse is what it does to a persons sense of worth and value and dignity - don't worry - this will return or if it wasn't there in the first place, it will grow with every healthy, sane, strong, rational decision you make for yourself. Stay strong.

I stayed in my relationship with my abuser for far to long also. It took me so long to realize that it didn't matter what I did or didn't do While spending all my time focusing on how to make this man stop hurting me I failed to recognize just how much of what made me who I am had vanished. Things I loved to do, my goals in life, people who were most important to me....gone. Eventually, who I was, had been drained in to just a shell of me. <br />
<br />
I am almost 15 months free from over 11 years of abuse. I am on my own for the first time in my life with all of my children now grown.<br />
My body has healed, but I realize now just how deep the verbal and emotional abuse ran. <br />
To have a place to share like this is just what we as survivors need. <br />
I applaud you, chaparrita!!

I am trying to comment on as many stories as I can. It's frightening how many there are but they are all the same story. I waited 36 years before I realised that I couldn't help him and that my staying made it worse for both of us. I got out by the skin ofmy teeth and the police put me in touch with Womens Refuge who saved my life because I let them. I am now 57 and still frightened to be on my own but every day gets better. I am so glad you got out.

I empathise with you...

i volunteer at a domestic violence shelter. My advise is to educate yourself on domestic violence. usually there were signs in the first 3 yrs that you didnt know to look at. b/f entering another relationship you need to know those. and you need the education for your daughter. childern of abuse are easy to become victims themselves. read Why does he do that by Lundy

That's crazy good you left him. I wonder how some people can be that way.... they must be emotionally disturbed. <br />
I mean just like that... nothing, then after 3 years? <br />
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Well don't ever go back to him. Wish u the besrt

Read about this fraud wife beater here that is on pof <br />
<br />
http://jsbigdog.blogbus.com/logs/33296438.html<br />
<br />
Ask about a link exchange.

I'm sorry for al that you went through, nobody deserves to be treated like you were. You are a strong person and it takes so much strength to leave. i myself was recently a victim of dv. It was his first time to give me a black eye but I left with our daughter. Now it's been 2 months almost since it all happened and I feel so sad and lonely at times. I cant wait till I can say a year has passed like you! If you ever need to talk you can with me.