Even Now The Pain Remains. -- A Poem I Wrote

"The Aftermath of Greg"

In the daytime, my pain is masked by a weak smile and a false sense of security.
The only ones who can see through the mask are those who've worn it too,
We're soldiers fighting the same war in silent unity.

But when night falls and I'm all alone,
The pain swells and infects my mind and body.
1,000 needles pierce my heart with syringes that suck life out of me.
Venom replaces my blood, my veins become dry and brittle.
I'm rotting from the inside out and I've got no will to fight it.
Muscles that once made me strong waste away in defeat.
My skin and bones are brittle, shattering at the slightest touch.
I want to scream, but my voice lacks the strength,
Instead I weep, choking on my own breath.

What good is sleep when nightmares become reality.
I look forward to these nights when I can put down my gaurd and let myself feel the pain.
My body has adapted to it, tricked into believing pain is good-
With its venom coursing through my veins, and my bones hardening to stone.
Im no longer afraid of the pain, it lives inside me now, I thrive on its presence.
I don't quiver, I don't waiver, I stand taller than before.
The innocent girl is inside me still- trapped and crumpled up small
She weeps every now and then, desperately crying out to be set free.
But I can't let her out now, now she's the enemy.
She makes me weak and reminds me of what its like to feel,
And I don't feel pain anymore, I feed on it.
She speaks words of hope to me, that maybe one day someone will come along and help her take back over me.
Fill me with life and love, oh what a dream that would be...
physicsgirl physicsgirl
18-21, F
Dec 13, 2012