I Feel Beaten Down
My boyfriend is really controlling and manipulative. I am always wrong, he is right, no matter what. I am nice to him when he throws fits, throws beer, and is generally being a baby. I used to clean up after him, but last week when he threw his soup at the wall I didn't clean it up. I told him it was unacceptable behavior... go me. I've been excusing his behavior since he is recovering from a severe brain injury... but it's been a year and I don't see how this situation can improve. I want to get away.
Anyway, I feel trapped even though we broke up. He wants to work things out, but I just don't know if I can take this anymore. It's not fair to me that he just doesn't see how bad he is for me.... why doesn't he want me to have a nice boyfriend? Why won't he let me go? He says he loves me but his actions say he loves what I do for him. He's always asking for something, never giving back. Why does love blind us like this?
He hasn't hit me in 4 months. And he's been really good at not yelling and trying to communicate... I just don't think he knows how! How can we work things out when I feel so used?