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My Theory On Love, and My Virginity

I have never told anyone this before, mostly because they would think I was insane...but I believe that very few people will actually ever experience true love, honest to God true love. I think that about 75% maybe even more of the people who think that they are in love aren't. The word true love is used so loosely it doesn't even mean anything anymore. But I do believe a small percentage of people will be lucky enough to find it, the real deal, unconditional love. Of course there is no such thing as the perfect  mate but there is such a thing as true love. This love is so strong, that I would only want to be with this one person my whole life, and no one else. So I have saved my virginity for this one person, this one love. And if I am not one of the lucky ones and I never experience this kind of love, then I will die a Virgin. I'm OK with that, yeah it sucks but that is how important and meaningful this is to me.
missadventurer missadventurer 22-25, F 64 Responses Aug 11, 2007

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I F A White Girl Would Ever Give Me A Chanse To Be Her Bf

I Did Some Interviews In Sharing A Story How A Girl Wants A Guy Or Bf To Know Them.

hello everyone how is your day let me share you little story in those days i been busy doing interviews it always wonder me if there still virjin on this earth
well that point is that am getting right answers they talk to me with respect and that is what counts am so thank ful for that. we all know and this world
is a lot crazy thinks going on but that is not my point my point is that i found out not all girls are that same they talk alot of craft cause mostly girls want there friends to be like them but no all girls are that same hard to believe not even guys there are still virgins. mostly girls dont like guys with tatoes no even girls they want there bf to be clean in dont have nothing marked in his body cause they dont look handsome pretty well every body has diferent opinon like for me i like girls who are clean 2 as they want us to be 2 and my opinion is not to judge but a girl with nothing mark on his body cause that is that beautiful girl that almost guy wants even if you dont think so there are even with manners, some girls thinks there not faith ful guys they still are even if you dont think so

maybe they educated me like that who knows well am still young and i learned that manners is always important if she fews years yonger than me then i tell her to wait be patient to wait for to see if they give me in opurtunity i tell her to tell her parents that i want to talk to them and wait for a chanse well sometimes parents sisters etc they could tell you why you dont have bf gf why you dont get married so if we dont answer that question they think we are gay mostly are not married cause they have to many rejections or never have bf gf and sometimes guys look at girl when he likes he started so much looking at her why girls dont understand instead of saying thank you they come agresive and tell you why you staring at me so much in beacause of that that guy turns his head fast cause he likes her in by that way he dont know how to start a conversation cause of his shyness been timid

first question sometimes i aks my self for this moment lets for get about ages and physic look at my picture trght this story i love all kind of girls but i want to know if somethere will give in opurtunity to date a guy like me


well i was born in raiced usa but am mexican and think i been learning between my studys alot of guys wants girls for sex they dont want only one girl they want to keep going like it that was right yea that word is crazy in this those days but there some people out there alot girls said there not faitful guys in thats why thy want to be like guys be bchy but there other girls that dont like that guys seems them as in object they want too be love by his man been respectful her in no wanting her for sex when they first mee that could every where now fbk internt wow well into me i look in that girl eyes but if that comes then it has to come am not dyen to have some

that first think what a guy or some girls mostly guys do this if you love me when they first start meeting can you plese send me a pict of you naked i want to see how everything looks on you of course you start compliment things nice so they could show you more about her body to do things to mk you you know what but do you think that usually love no matter how girls are but mostly of them they want respect to be with her that you guys be her companied do what they like to do am not saying to do what they do. i mean about understanding her be into her stufs like hobbies careers thinks thy want to encourage in life

there is many ways they could be love. love is not about sex love is about to know each other as well

thank you so much for reading guys in girls but i still wondering if any white girl would date me well i ever have chanse am from california

you can do it,i did! married at 27 and i was a virgin. It was and is the best decision ever.My husband appreciates me soo much for tht decision. Dnt let anyone bring u down with their views ok.

Well, I really respect your decision! It's a really hard one to make, and you seem confortable with it...

I'm not going to say i agree with you, partly because i dont, but mostly because you dont need that! I will just say that i don't think true love is a matter of luck. I think that love is a matter of commitment

There is a Calvin and Hobbes ***** comic that says exactly what i'm trying to. Anyway, i think you just have to find someone you like that likes you back. If you have that, anything is possible!

You are a wonderful person. I feel you are doing the right thing by waiting for marriage. One day, your dreams will come true :)

i think that u are such a strong person

i think that u are such a strong person and honest and one day u'll find the honest person that will love u and love him :) peace

It seems very stupid that someone just ignores all the fun he or she can have and stays a virgin until the right moment, but i believe it to be right...

It's common sense to know that religion does not do this. It's the person who does not think logically.

Your statement was illogical and not at all common sense.

Scientifically love is a series of chemical highs. There are stages and aspects, you must remember the reason two people come together is truly to procreate. I don't fully agree with your theory i think most people fall in love, but love fades. Primates are not known for monogamy, why is the genus homo be an exception? You can beat around the bush with virginity, but i know am a virgin, and virginity is a man made thing. Its a concept not some special thing.

- "Why is the genus homo be an exception?", "But i know am a virgin." Excuse the errors people, i apologize sincerely!

It’s a life choice. :3

<p>thats really nice.. i hope you do find that special someone to share your life with..<br />
its probably more then 75% of people that are miserable.. it was probably lust that they confused for love.. and when lust is gone.. there is no love to continue the relationship.. also i think there is such a thing as the perfect person.. because perfection is in the eye of the beholder.. so there is someone out there that you think will be perfect for you..<br />
people settle for second best.. its a shame that they do.. but i guess each person is free to live their life the way they want to...</p>

What a load of bull****! I've found that most girls who think like that simply have body/personal image issues and they have deluded themselves into thinking they are doing the right thing. Sex is a lot of fun and you simply are missing out on one of the best part of your adult life.

it is no fun to be a young girl and single and left holding the baby,no help from the low life that did this to her ,well he moves on to the next one,baby's cost a lot of money,that fact the low life would not know about,as he it not around to help bring up the baby,so sex is no fun for the girl,waiting will mean she will not end up with a low life ,that calls himself a man.

wooo!

She's unlikely to get pregnant if she protect herself. Worst case scenario, she can get an abortion.

*Clap clap clap*! I am really thrilled to 'hear' someone wanting to hold on to their virginity. I was one of those that saved myself for marriage, and my husband always told me how happy he was that I'd given him the ultimate gift, my virginity. You rock!! :-) :-)

Hrm....interesting dynamic. I'm not going to ask if he did the same to you....but I'm sure that you would have felt the same if he had done that to you as you did to him (if he didn't).

Probablly so, but I'm glad that my ex wasn't a virgin, cause two virgins going at it....AWKWARD!! heheheh. Plus, he was 7 yrs older than me.

true love. Virginity...... When two are in the same love with the same emotional attachment the true love can exist there. Virginity...... Is a symbol of faithfulness but lack of opportunity.

Thank you so much for posting this! I feel like I live alone in a world where true love in nothing but a myth and people have sex to get rid of their virginity. I have found my prince charming but I need to meet him....

I understand how you feel, and I feel the same way about love. I think there are a variety of people you could spend your life with and be happy, and maybe that one perfect person. The chance of finding him or her is slim, but that doesn't mean I can't experience what life has to offer, including sex and losing my virginity, with someone I can be happy with, even if he's not my soulmate.

You are insane. Stop reading/watching epic love stories, get out of your fairy tale fantasy and let us welcome you to real life.<br />
Where virginity is nothing, sex is just an activity and love is just a hormonal rush.

"I have never told anyone this before, mostly because they would think I was insane...but I believe that very few people will actually ever experience true love, honest to God true love."<br />
<br />
I think people expect fairy tales, not real life. True love to me personally is just being happy with person your with. Making them happy makes you happy, just being near them makes you happy, doing things with them makes you happy, smelling them, seeing them makes you happy. Holding them in your arm's, holding there hand makes you happy. a filling of being complete with them around, instead of that nagging emptiness.

In the old ways of thinking, there are three phases in a woman's life, the virgin or the matron phase, the mother phase, and the crone phase, for now, this is how you feel and this is how you believe, and this is fine. Life and time have ways of changing our minds as we go along and that is fine too. Love is a wonderful thing, a sacred thing, but, sex is also a wonderful thing and it can be a healing and healthy thing as well, for me, I think sex is sacred, it IS the life force, a gift to all and a huge complicated responsibility as well. There is time to make those personal choices...just please don't label yourself "used" if you aren't a virgin when the big love of your life comes along, if he's the right one, it won't matter in the least to either of you, the right man appreciates all of the experiences that come along with the love of his life, a sexually empowered woman is a beautiful gift too. Bless you always.

why do people build sex up to be a huge deal? essentially, all it is is an activity. <br />
<br />
i personally prefer having sex with someone that i care about & trust, but only because i feel comfortable with them (i am getting naked in front of them, after all). <br />
<br />
& "virginity" is seen as this precious, "special" thing - when i lost my virginity, it was horrible. it hurt, i bled everywhere & the sex was terrible - we were like 2 fish flopping around on top of each other. losing your virginity sucks - trust me, it's not at all "special"

This makes me sad :(

what's sad is that (ancient) society has built up virginity as being something "special" &amp; "valuable" in order to chastise (namely) girls. by controlling women's bodies, the fundamentalist leaders could control society - it's very powerful.

i have been married four times .my first three wives died .two with heart attacks and one with cancer. i have been so fortunate to have finally found that one true love . my soulmate if you will. we have been married now for nearly seven years. we get along well and are very happy together.my last third wife marie and i had been married for thirty seven years. when she passed away i was already sixty five.I wondered if i would ever find anyone to love me again.i had been out of circulation for almost fourty years. I had no idea even where to start.one night i was in a chat room and i noticed this guy chatting with a girl and he said he was from the same town that i was so i got to talking to him . we discovered that we knew some of the same people . so over a few days we became friends.I asked him one day if he would like to go to Mac Donalds for a burger and a coke to meet and get to know each other better. he agreed and it was nice meeting him face to face. he asked if he could use my cell phome to call his mother and check on her . so he did and found that she was waiting on a bus nearby.so i told hime to tell her that we would come and pick her up and take her home too. That is how i first met my future wife Roberta.

wow really interesting story aniowagirl!!!! thank you for sharing!!

Wish there were more people that are not ashamed of acknowledging just what you have. I wish there were more women like you out there expressing their stance like you.

so didd you find the one?

THAT'S RIGHT I UNDERSTAND..

I am the same way and I wish I knew more people and had more friends like this. Thank you for sharing!

i wish i would have waited...i agree with you i got to know my previous two gfs well before we did things. I am still in love with them but they don't love me :(

hang in there!

I feel like i have written your story myself. I am 35 now and still searching for love, I only want it once and feel the same about I will die a virgin then just "settle" for whatever i can find. Thank you for sharing I am happy to see that i am not the only one with this view.

wow ...as a guy that is in the same boat as her its awsome to read all these comments ...so far its been a year with my girlfriend and we have not done any thing sexual yet ...it just don't seem to be the right moment ..so 21 years without sex and counting ...thats my life :)

i still think the same till now but some times i go weaker tired of waiting without finding that special one till now but i still think it worth waiting for .and i wish that i will find out that i was right soon enough

I am hoping you find love. I am 31 year old woman and haven't come close to finding love. It's something I thought would have happened by now. Being this age I think perspective changes.

I have been in Love... still am really. <br />
<br />
It sucked. Still does... <br />
<br />
Love is over rated. If everyone got to experience it the suicide rate would be much higher. :p

Yep, I think you're right. So many people are in a relationship and say they're in love, and then two months later the relationship is over. That's not really what I'd consider to be love - at least, not true love.

Yep, I think you're right. So many people are in a relationship and say they're in love, and then two months later the relationship is over. That's not really what I'd consider to be love - at least, not true love.

(thumbs up!)

I like this theory and I believe the fact that there is no one that is perfect for you makes it make you love the one you have even more, because it is real.

OMG-you sound exactly like me. I think very few people ever find real love otherwise there would not be so many divorces. I am 43 and I will probably die a virgin the way I am going but we will see. My friend says I will live a lot longer then 43 so who knows. lol

I believed in those kinds of ideas until I reached an age where I thought "screw it, I'm getting old. Might as well at least get laid."

young lady you have all my respect!!! I am 53 years old and have been married and divorced 6 times and engaged for the last 6 years. Stand your ground and do not let anybody change you!!!

well in sept i shall be a 59 year old male virgin,we have the true morals,we all have something to be proud of,so hold your head up high,true love can wait.

You are right...many people today say 'true love' without being serious about it, and not really feeling it for the other person. I have always said that two people should NOT love each other *because* they have sex, but instead should consider sex because they love each other enough to feel ready. You're doing the right thing by taking it seriously and waiting!

Die a virgin? Don't you ever get the feeling that you just want to get it over with? I am in 100% agreement with you, but it is just so hard for me. We are constantly bombarded with sex everywhere. I want to wait for that special person, but I really just cannot see myself dying a virgin, the experience itself I think is not what you and myself fear, but the repercussions of it. If you had the choice to be with someone who you fully respect and trust, knowing that nothing would go wrong and after it was over your relationship would not change, would you still say no?

people shouldn't come here if they can't handle the comment, flirtingwithdisaster. most likely, people show dislike toward each other, and the observation is that there isn't enough true love. your attitude is only proving her right.

im a virgin also your morals are very simular to mine

im a virgin also your morals are very simular to mine

im a virgin also your morals are very simular to mine

gg

I agree true love is very rare. I think many of us truly fall in love with someone, and they often reciprocate with their affections, and tell us they love us back, but it only lasts for a little while because they never truly loved us back. We were nothing more than convenient companionship for someone too afraid to be alone for even a moment... It's very hard to be a romantic most of the time. Good Luck to all of us.

The experience of waiting for your soul mate in marriage is not a very common one these days. Very few people these days are capable of understanding this first-hand.<br />
<br />
It takes a lot of self-love, later shared with your formal life-long partner, to wait.

Very good story! You are making a wise decision.

I feel the same way. I'm also waiting. I'm happy there are others who think like me and I'm not insane or strange.

true love is relative to what the person feels, whose to argue? I'd consider that i have felt true love, the truest, deepest love..that shatters you, the obsession, yearning and passion. There are people out there who don't understand what love is yet and hopefully they'll find out, because it's the most beautiful and content feeling there is, nothing beats it. But when it ends, it destroys you. Hopefullllly it's out there again though.

it is you that has the morals .those that think it is wrong to be a virgin,have no morals.i have been told many times i must be gay.but i must wait for the one and only.i am proud of being britains oldist male virgin at 57.it is virgins that have morals.and what we have is something to be proud of.

gotta give you kudos.i'm glad you are not influenced by what others demand of you.

In other words, you want to associate sex with a deeply emotional experience.<br />
<br />
"True love" is not an actual experience, however, but an abstraction, and the danger of it is that it creates unrealistic expectations.<br />
<br />
You see, the mistake many people make is indulging in the thought that love comes to you. In fact it comes from you. <br />
<br />
The mature perspective is not to expect love to fall from the heavens into your lap, but to learn to love those with whom you have relationships in life. Whether it be an immediate connection, or one that grows slowly over time, love must develop from within you and flow outward to others. And that only comes with emotional maturity.<br />
<br />
But you will discover this in your own way.

Thank you, I do like it. Do you know who wrote it?

I was given this poem & I thought you'd like it:<br />
<br />
Love is a friendship that has caught fire.<br />
It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing & forgiving.<br />
It is loyalty through good times & bad.<br />
It settles for less than perfection & makes allowances for human weaknesses.<br />
<br />
Love is content with the present, it hopes for the future & it doesn’t brood over the past.<br />
It’s the day-in-&-day-out chronicle of irritations, problems, compromises, small disappointments, big victories & common goals.<br />
<br />
If you have love in your life it can make up for a great many things you lack.<br />
If you don’t have it, no matter what else there is,<br />
it’s not enough…

You have my respect! May the force be with you!

im 100% with you on this one.<br />
be faithful to your true love, if you dont find them, you dont.<br />
:]

wow, you took the words right out of my mouth! I feel the exact same way! That's why I'm waiting too!

Kudos to you for having strong convictions about what you want from your relationships, and for having the courage to state your beliefs and craft a potentially magnificent life for yourself.<br />
<br />
And I'm pretty sure that being a skydiving, safari-undertaking, haunted house visiting adventurer that you most certainly understand the value and true meaning of experiences! <br />
<br />
Go you! :D

^Is this sarcasm?

I wish I could have maintained my conviction like you. Good work. I would be a lot happier dying a virgin than where I am now.

Your philosophy is terrific and your morals are untouchable! I admire you for that. Your true love could be anywhere... I really hope you find it...

This is called the EXPERIENCE project, correct? You are obviously someone who does not appreciate the value of an experience, moreso because you would deny yourself it for a lifetime.<br />
<br />
Also, I don't believe you. You're too young to even know that you're ready to make such a life commitment. Further, to make such a judgment on others, that society does not know what love is and only you (and possibly a few others) understand is not only the height of arrogance, but simply quite rude.

I went through the same thing you did, I didn't have very many happy boyfriends,but I waited for my soulmate and I found him consented to sex and he's the only one I've ever had and we have been happily married ten years!! He's nine yrs older. Older guys are so much more mature.Anyways, It will happen for you,just have some patience and love will come your way. J

I hope you find your true love. True love is give and take, learning to live with another's quirks, forgiving mistakes, nurturing life's hurts. Sex and love are not the same, one is the physical release all living things need, Love is the emotional bond that envelops two people. Good luck