Brokenhearted

Hi,I lost my soul mate in November 08, he went to work as usual at 9.o'clock and was dead at 11 o'clock,whilst at work having suffered a major heart attack,he was a beautiful person,we have two grown up children and three grandchildren ,the older one who is eight misses him terribly,as do my son and daughter,the other two grandsons are only babies,yet at least he got the chance to hold them and know them. I am still devastated at my loss,as  we were married for thirty two years, I am trying to change my routine,as my whole life revolved around him,we had such wonderful plans for our retirement,but sadly it wasn't meant to be,I am so lonely,in this big house, and like so many others I put on a brave face,but inside I feel as if my heart has been ripped out. I know you all can identify with me and I thank you for your time in reading this.love to all.

winder winder
51-55
1 Response Mar 22, 2009

i wonder why we all feel the need to put on a brave face, i had a friend visit on the weekend and she asked me if i was ok and i said i'm fine when in reality i am not <br />
why do we do this, is it for ourselves or for everyone else, i dont want to share my grief because part of me doesnt want it to go away because i am not ready to be "better" i somehow get comfort in being so overwhelmingly sad when i am on my own - is it better to share ???