One Month and Counting

My husband passed away a month ago at the age of 51 years.  I miss him. 

I have three grown children, all of whom are offering support in their own special ways.

The reason I titled this message the way I did was, I have never had time pass so slowly.  One month and 8 days........  I am journaling the details, at least what I can remember, not so much as to be able to remember but to give the story of his death a place to be, not just in my head.

I was with moments after the heart attack took him.  I tried to give him mouth to mouth but I knew he was gone.  I could see it in his eyes, I loved his eyes.

I have flashes of memory, just like a slide show; of the events that followed.  Do they ever stop?  I know time will take away the sharpness of those images.  I am strong, I will carry on.  I want to carry the wonderful memories not these images.

Any advise


tw362 tw362
1 Response Jul 30, 2009

Hi, I am so sorry of your loss..I too lost my husband suddenly 4 months ago to a massive heart attack...I began cpr and called 911 and knew he was gone right away...WHEN THEY CAME TO PICK UP MY HUSBAND THEY HAD TO DRAG HIS BODY DOWN THE STAIRS BECAUSE he was 6'3" and 230 pounds..I cannot get that thumping sound of his body going down the stairs out of my head...I understand how difficult it is...But I can tell you that for me it is easing up more..I am now rembering the special times we had together , but I miss him now more than ever...I am 50 yo..with 3 grown kids too..They have been so wonderful and we are now closer than ever....God has blessed me with a wonderful family...I will pray for peace and comfort for you and your family..Hang in there ..God Bless. Cattaboo