I Shouldn't Have To Beg For Sex, & Affection...

Is it Just Me? Well I have been living with a man now for 2 years. We REALLY get along great, he talks to me, and we have so much in common... we like to ride motorcycles and do things like that together but, there is only one problem lack of sex... for about 4-5 months now he has grown complacent I guess you'd call it....I am really confused? for the first 1 1/2 yrs. I had NO problem getting his attn., but lately he hasn't been interested in me.....I've had to beg him to make love. the last few times we've been together and even then it was short and sweet wam bam thank you mamm.... so I got fed up one day and asked him whats wrong?.. he just says that theres nothing wrong, that everythings fine that he loves me more than the world and I have gave him so much happiness and as I said there isn't a problem any wheres else , but this is making me crazy.. because it just dosen't seem right ,Our relationship was so good for so long.. What Happened? I just feel so unattractive and so discussted .... one evening I was checking our email accounts(he gave me access to ALL his accounts) and there popped up a p*rn site ,so I looked back thru the Internet History on our computer and he has been looking at lots of p*rn, .. I asked him about it and he said that he was "Just Looking" that he got some (spam) email eg."on look at hot singles" I feel so bad that I have had to resort to looking at our internet history to see what he's been up to... He doesn't know that I have been checking up on him like this .. so everytime I ask him whats wrong with me , why dosent he want desire me anymore ..He comes up with all kinds of excuses he's just too tired, his headaches, his backaches, and the best one he's old ... (he's only 49) bull crap!!!! and I ask if he has ever looked at those web sites anymore . and he says no .. It cuts like a knife thru my heart.. I love him so much..I don't understand why he has to look at these pics to get aroused because he has a loving sexy woman waiting in his bed to look at and be with...I guess he wants to look at these pics instead , maybe he doesn't want me anymore .. I guess the "new" has worn off ...should I just let it go and accept that I will have a sparce sex relationship ? If things wasn't so good every where else I would leave.... am I makin too big a deal about this?
donnaf1971 donnaf1971
36-40, F
May 23, 2012