Married and Husband Won't Touch Me Unless He Wants Sex

I am a 35 yr old married woman whose only been married for alittle over a year.  My husband and I had a wonderful sex life before we got married we would at least have sex twice a week and we lived at least 2 hours away from one another.  He went to Afghanistan for a year and came home and in the beginning we had sex at least once a week and now its to the point he makes excuses every time I touch him.  We now only have sex maybe once a month or every 3 1/2 weeks.  I know he loves me and I love him but in the past we did have trust issues with me not trusting him because he was cheating on me.  I don't know if he is cheating on me now that we are married, but sometimes it feels like it.  I think he values marriage enough thought to not cheat but now he's not really into sex with me and I have tried just about everything to get his attention and it doesn't seem to be working.  I feel like he only wants sex on his terms and that is the only time he starts feeling all touchy feely with me and that turns me off because I don't think its fair for him to deny me but almost demand that I please him.  Of course this hurts me because its not that he really demands it, but its just that he gets angry and upset if I act like I'm not in the mood.  During this whole time he has denied me I am having to satisfy myself to avoid having thoughts or urges of wanting to cheat on him.  What should I do?

athrower athrower
31-35, F
2 Responses Mar 16, 2009

Don't act in haste.Have patience and try to find out the real cause of his antipathy.Talk to him. Discuss your agony and try tomake him respond favourably.

Confront him straight out. Have the talk. If he denies or tries to cut you off, look for **** on the computer or other signs that he may be cheating.<br />
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Then tell him your going to counseling with/without him.