Sad...scared...proud

Hey everyone! Well I just thought I would write to say my boyfriend is leaving on Friday to be deployed and I am scared to death of him going. I try to be strong for him but its really hitting me hard right now. Everyone always tells me how brave I am for being with him but sometimes I don't think I am that brave... To me being brave is about always being there for your loved one (which i always am) but also to me being brave is never crying in front of them but i am always crying in front of him and never leaving his side. Sometimes it feels like he gets tired of me being there for him. I love him soo much and if it weren't for him I wouldn't be the person i am!

I can't get the thought of him leaving out of my mind. We were talking on the phone last night when he told me that the base where he is right now is sending people home that are supposed to be deploying with him. Part of me hopes that he is one of those people that gets sent home cause they don't need him or anything. The other part of me wants him to go cause he wants to and then that will mean that he will be happy and that is all I have ever wanted for him.

I am always the one giving advice to other military girlfriends, but now I need someone to talk to me. So please if anyone has anything to share don't be afraid to talk to me.
hisarmysupport hisarmysupport
22-25, F
1 Response Aug 11, 2010

It may sound bad, but the thing that keeps me going everyday is knowing that things aren't as bad now a days as they were a few years ago! He's gonna be okay (: Just keep faith and everything will turn out okay. He's got too much to live for! I'm not really sure how much that helps, but i know that's what keeps me going as well as everyone on this website!