I Hope We Last When He Leaves

My boyfriend is 19 and signed up for the Marines. He made the decision before we even met but I support it 100%. We talked about it before we started dating, so I knew what I was getting myself into. At first the plan was he wasn't going active so he was going to go to basics then come and stay home with me for two years, which I loved because he would definitely be here to see me graduate and I love having him around. Then change of plans, he would go to basics then stay here for four years, which I loved even more! I was happy with his decision and he told me he was too, then one day his friend went to see his recruiter with us and he convinced him to go active and my boyfriend said he would sleep on it but that happened to be the final decision day. I was sitting there hoping he wouldn't agree to this, but he did. Right when I heard him say "Okay, I'll do it." my heart dropped! I couldn't believe it. He chose it because of the better benefits which is completely understandable, but it still hurt knowing that he's going to be gone right away instead of staying here with me for four years. I'm worried while he's gone he'll meet someone new or stop missing me or something. What makes it worse is I can't go live with him until I finish up high school. When we talk about it he always reassures me that it'll all work out but obviously I still worry. I know I'll stay faithful and everything and I really hope he does too. I really love this guy and I don't know how to deal with this. He's leaving to go to meps in a couple hours and he'll only be gone 3 days - a week and I already miss him. That makes me wonder how much it's going to suck when he actually goes away. Being young makes this whole thing suck even more! I would love if there were people I could connect with and talk to. Like young women who are going through the same thing.
idontknoow idontknoow
18-21, F
4 Responses Jul 31, 2012

i know how you feel. it sucks being young and in high school while your man is away. your parents still control where you go and what you do. because he is gone, we want to talk about marriage and moving away, but people laugh and say we are wayyy too young. the distance sucks, i cant lie. but it makes our relationship soooo much stronger. stay busy and stay by his side. he needs you!

instead of thinking of this as time that he is spending away from you, think of it as some time that you can have to yourselg. of course you will miss him and think about him all the time, but you are young and you deserve to have fun! my boyfriend and i are both 18 and he left for basic training and AIT at the end of June. I usually spend a lot of my free time with him, but now that he is away, i have been able to spend a lot more time with my friends. and this is good since i just graduated high school and most of them will be going away for college, its a chance for me to spend time with them before they go. i know that when my bf comes back, i will be spending a lot of time with him, so im trying to spend a lot of time with friends and family now. another piece of advice that i have is to write to him EVERYDAY that he is gone. it makes me feel so much better to tell him how i am feeling everyday and he really appreciates the letters. dont dwell on the fact that he is gone, look at it as an opportunity to strengthen your relationships. just keep busy and time will fly!

My boyfriend is leaving for the Marines in four days. He told me that he'll be going into a two month boot camp and then he'll be going straight into military classes and training. But he wants this as a career so there's no plan to come back to here ever. Most likely, I will never see him again in my life, and as much as this hurts, I have to keep living my life and he has to keep living his. So we made a decision that we'll go our separate ways and that if things were meant to be they would work out on their own. It's kind of comforting knowing that, but this is gonna be incredibly difficult. Just know there are other people who here that need to know someone is going through the same thing too. <br />
And as the other post said, stay busy. Surround yourself with good friends who will help you through everything and make things so much easier.

All I can say is stay busy. Do things for you. I know if I was as young as you I wouldn't be hanging around. I would miss going out with people to dances and on dates. Both my bf and I wouldn't have been together if we were so young. I'm almost done with college so I can make my own dreams come true as well. Just take sometime to decide what you want in your life too. He made a decision for his life and perhaps someday yours too but I think right now you both need to experience life. I hope this helps a bit. In no way am I saying not to be with him but my bf has been gone all summer and I did great things just for me. Don't forget about being the sweet happy girl you are.

Thank you for the advice!

No problem just hope things work out for you :-)