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His Sister Hates Me

my boyfriend is in the marines bootcamp, and his sister can't stand me. she thinks im a **** and all i do is party. which i don't!! i barely party and im so far off from a ****, she even told her mom all these crazy lies about me. She thinks shes perfect, shes never gotten below a B & doesn't party or do anything. i don't drink or smoke so i don't understand the problem if i do show up at a party ( & the ones I do go to are small and just a bunch of friends) She doesn't want me to go to his graduation and she was my ride there.. Her and I use to be bestfriends and if i try to talk to her she catches an attitude, i really don't know what to do. All my boyfriend ever talks about is me getting to know his family & since he's left they just grew to dislike me. I really don't know what to do, i'm nervous he's going to come home and break up with me because of this. He knows I've gone to parties, he use to bring me to them. He knows im not a ****, im a virgin and i would never cheat. That's not a big deal its this family thing. i'm stuck...
LovinLu12 LovinLu12 16-17, F 3 Responses Jan 20, 2013

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As a protective older sister I will just let you know that any girl my brother brings home will be held to an extremely high standard. My brother has introduced me to ONE girl that I haven't hated. This girl is attending Columbia University in the fall, is an active participant in her church's volunteer program. I have never heard her swear, she hold's her own in the kitchen and is planning on rushing my sorority. I like her. Also since you and her used to be best friends she probably is really pissed off that you're dating her brother. You need to talk to her directly. Don't get your boyfriend involved, that's THE WORST thing you can do. If you make him choose between you and his family, well then, bye bye sweetie you're out!. Ask her exactly what her problem is. I respected one of my brother's ex's when she confronted me. I told her exactly why I didn't like her. She said, woah, I didn't realize I come off that way. I still didn't like her, but I didn't hate her after that either. Also, my brother, like your boyfriend knows how hard it is to please me. He's lived with me, like your boyfriend has lived with her his ENTIRE life. He'll know whether she's lying, or being irrational. However, if she's being totally justified in her disdain for you, fix it quick because you two won't last long.

I did ask her what her problem was and it led to a fight. Although she did message me the other day and said she was just mad because she felt i chose him over her & that we never got our friendship back we talked it all out!! It was great we decided to start over, we apologized and everything. Then his mom called the next day and told me ican ride with her or with the sister. So I texted the sister and asked and then told her its perfectly fine if she doesnt want to drive me down and she never even replied to me. I find this so rude, the least she couldve done was say no. thats it, but the fact that she's ignoring me is so immature! Even in school if I walk by her she looks down.

You just maintain strong, tell him whats going on when you talk to him. When you encounter a difficult situation just stand your ground and be respectful. Maybe one of your cousins can take you or a sibling.

my boyfriends mom doesn't like me but you know what i stay respectful and nice all the time but continue to focus on my man because they won't always be there

His mom will always be there. She, will always be a crucial person in his life. If she doesn't like you there probably is a good reason for it. Ask her why she doesn't like you (remain respectful) and see if its something you can change. I promise you, a man will not choose you over his mother. So if it comes down to it, you need to know what you're doing wrong.

I'm not doing anything she is just crazy and wants to keep him all to herself she is single and miserable there's nothing for me to say and he has choosen me over and over because he knows she is crazy too but that is why i remain respectful and nice because he sees for himself it's her...but i do agree with you that family is first and the stress from the military and family pressure can cause a breakup.