About To Fall

Not sure where to start what to do. I feel lost with my teens, we used to be so close when they were younger now they are very far away I have been told that they need space I give them too much love. My marriage is empty, I now have no job, and the stress level is rising by the moment. I dont know where to start to fix this, to fix me, to make my life better, I am putting on weight hide in the house, feel lifeless and tired. Wish I just felt alive again. At 43 I feel like my world is nothing but dark after giving and giving in my marriage and kids I stand here now all alone with two kids that look at me like I have two heads and 6 eyes and a husband that gets angry all the time.
foggydarkness foggydarkness
41-45, F
3 Responses Aug 11, 2011

I have 3 teenagers, and decided YEARS ago to spend these years amused by their behavior. You can't understand them, control them, and win. Did you know that their brains are not wired to exhibit empathy or selflessness? They don't mature until they are between 19-22....really!! I have a blast with my kids; they get frustrated with ME because I just laugh off their nonsense. They don't get what they want....I tell them ALL the time that it must be great to be a teenager and KNOW everything. <br />
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Sounds like you need to take control of YOUR life....not as a wife, not as a mother, but as YOU. Do you remember YOU? Be selfish for a while. Who cares if your husband gets mad? Eff him. Maybe you should get mad. Find yourself. This is the bold brave time of your life - 40's is when we have the most power and beauty, and you need to own your destiny! You'll find people, like your husband and kids, begging for your attention when you stop giving it away....and if they don't want it, they don't deserve it. <br />
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Best of luck to you!!!

i don't think you can love your kids too much. maybe sometimes you can give them what they want and not what they need. sometimes it is the most loving thing to do for them is to show our kids that we value ourselves too. that way, they will know to do that when they are adults.

When you make your bed, generally it's required for you to lay in it. You gave and gave to others against the very laws of life, thinking that was the path to follow. Now, as you have reached your mature years, you realize that perhaps you missed something. Playing the game of life begins against a master checkmate pla<x>yer, hidden within you. One you have unwisely given little attention to. Welcome to the club, billions strong. If you dare to face yourself, I can introduce you.