I got my prescription for adderall when I was going through a bad marriage. I am now divorced from him, engaged to the most wonderful man who makes me happier than I ever thought possible. We have a 1 year old daughter and he has a 14 year old son from a previous relationship. My life is better than I ever imagined it being!
About 5 or 6 months ago I got back on my adderall. I knew I didn't need it but I knew it would help me lose weight since I have no time to exercise (I work full time on top of being a first time mom) and am always drained. Well every single month my prescription adderall xr30 runs out in 14 days instead of 30, I'm taking too many every day, I'm snorting some, crushing some, and taking some as directed but I DONT KNOW WHY! I love my life yet I'm ruining it and I can't stop. I have an addictive personality, I like having a secret i guess, but I hate this. Every month I tell myself I'll be fine and take my meds as directed but I end up abusing them. No one knows and that makes it harder. Everyone thinks I am such a wonderful person and i wish I was.
My family deserves better, my body deserves better, and doing this isn't doing anything positive for me or anyone else. I'm pathetic. 29 perfect life everything I've ever wanted yet I can't quit.
jmh816 jmh816
31-35, F
4 Responses Aug 18, 2014

I decided to rip up my script on October 4, 2014. I haven't gone back. I don't feel like I'm as productive as I was when I had my pills but I feel so much better emotionally and physically. Not going to lie- I think about it almost daily and sometimes wish I had it back but I am so much better now without it I know I made the right decision.

I am in the same boat..

How are you on it at 29 ? My insurance won't cover mine but for only 3 more years when I turn 26.??

I don't have health insurance

I go to NA for other reasons. There are people there for adderal. It's a lot more comfortable than AA in my opinion.