Just How It Is

I've been doing drugs for about two years now. I'm only at the ripe age of 17. I never thought i would ever do drugs becuase in elementary, middle and even high school parents and teachers would scare us and tell us how drugs effect the body and things but its because they never did them and only went with what a book said. Like with most people it started with weed, then i moved onto adderall but only sparingly. I tried about every painkiller and add/adhd medication out there, even generics. I've been addicted to ritalin(and adderall or if im out whatever i can get that day) for a year now. I do it everyday, because it helps me stay awake and usually deal with people. It keeps me semi-stable and helps with my anxiety because i have yet to get anxiety meds. I need those though, i dont just want them to support my habbit. I've done shrooms, acid, E, huffed dust off. But recently I've been shooting up heroine. I have only done it 5 times. twice was 'cotton rinses' tho. At first I was terrified, I have never shot up. I'm kind of affraid of needles, despite the on ones i get peirced with. I have read stories including 'The Heroine Diaries' by Nikki Sixx, so i was so scared but my friend talked me through it and I felt it wouldnt be so bad. I always say I'll try everything once. She messured it out, added the water and cotton, cooked it, drew it up into the needle, got the air out, wrapped the tourniquet around my arm, picked one of my unusually large veins, put the needle in, undid the tourniquet, pushed in the plunger and did the rinse. I felt amazing. It was like nothing I've ever felt with any other drug. The second time I couldnt keep my eyes open because i felt sick, i ended up vomititng and going home, when i had to get up for school i vomited twice more and didnt end up going. the third time I felt amazing again and the cotton rinses didnt give me anything. I still do ritalin everyday, I also know it sounds like I'm going to become a junkie but I wont. I can't shoot myself up and I cant afford it. Its fun to do but not everyday. I'm not going to say 'Don't end up like me' or ' Don't do drugs' its your life do what you want, who am i, a perfect strange, to say no. I can stop , i mean i have before but i decided i didnt want to, i didnt need the drugs, like i wasnt going mad with out them i just like them. I will stop eventually. I know i can do it myself to, I stopped smoking without anybodys help. I wasnt one of those people whos always saying 'I need a cigarette' every five minutes, i was one of those who had 2 sometimes 3 a day or less. one pack would last me 2 and half weeks where it lasts some of my friends 2 and a half days. if i really wanted id stop this too but i dont. Point is if you want to do drugs go ahead but be safe about it like i am and try to be.

retteXmich19 retteXmich19
18-21, F
2 Responses Feb 8, 2010

I stopped awhile ago. My best friend who I used to do it on occasion with was addicted to it. She died on August 21, 2010 at age 18. It has been 1 month since that horrible day and I'm still just shuffling like a zombie through my days. I saw what it did to her. I wasnt going to end up like that. I did it only about 7 or 8 times within a year. the most i ever got was 15ccs. I can't EVER go near that stuff again. It took the one life that meant something to me.

sup yo. Im not gonna tell you to stop doing drugs either. but let me tell you what happened to me. i became a full straight junkie shooting up 30 bags of raw heroin a day. and it all started by just doing it occasionally and saying to my self that i wouldnt become a junkie. now, im a convicted felon for heroin posession and it ****** up my life. i went to rehab for 4 months, got clean for 5. i relapsed and im still using. even after all the bull **** it has caused me. be safe and watch out. opiate addiction is nothing to play with. if i had known what i know now at your age, i would have stopped after i only tried it a few times. good luck with it and be careful