A Real Problem
This is not a story about "Ohh I love reading sooo much I must be addicted lol". Sadly, for me a compulsive habit I developed years ago as a teenager has become a real problem in my life.
Once distracted by a print book or internet material, I keep going for hours or days, ignoring all obligations. When I finally stop I feeling guilty and depressed dealing with the aftermath. This bad habit has cost me dearly in my professional and personal life and I have spent years trying to find some strategy to resolve it, without success.
I really can’t explain exactly why I do it in any way that would make sense to others. I have plenty of interests and opportunities in my life, but my bad habit is preventing me from fully realizing them. And I certainly don’t read because I have “nothing else to do” - far from it.
I am painfully aware that I have a problem, but unable to break myself of it, despite wanting to very much. I value books and would like reading to be just a pleasant hobby to me as it is to most people rather than an obsession and grief. I cannot find help or support because no-one I try to talk about this takes it seriously. In some ways, I wish I had a “recognized” addiction like alcohol or gambling because then I could join a support group and at least have some source of encouragement. Maybe it would make the difference.