Nobody Wants Me

My love is not good enough. Any girl I have had a crush on. Any girl that's I've liked. Anyone I've loved .. or even wanted to love .. has made that perfectly clear. Nobody wants me. Nobody wants to touch me. Nobody .. my love isn't wanted. I'm not wanted. Oh of course, I've heard people say that someone will ..... but it never happens. Watch others find someone. Watch them cheat, be abusive, and they get another chance. And then another. And another. I can't even find someone to hold. Can't find my first, ever, kiss. Nobody will try ... which says so much more than any cliche about waiting. Nobody will try, not even an internet relationship ... even here, nobody wants me ...

Cursedboy Cursedboy 36-40, M 80 Responses Nov 5, 2008

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I understand where you coming from because im in the same situation as you. You just gotta learn to move on in your life if nobody wants you its their loss thats whats wrong with women today they dont want a good man, You sound like a great guy just keep your head up man dont worry about it. thats what im doing.

I hear you... I'm a 40 year old single dad, I adore my daughter, I run my own business, help run another, own a house and truck, college educated, active in volunteering for search and reasue as well as fire, sit on the board of a credit union and educate new families with habitat for humanity. However, I haven't dated in over a year because I always seem to be either just a temporary distraction or am the crutch to help a broken woman get back on her feet and then they move on to someone else when they can walk on their own... leaving me wondering WTF... So I've chalked it up to Occam's razor, all things being equal the simplest answer is the correct one which means the problem is with me so I figure why even bother getting involved with someone just to get knocked down again...

How about this - I am attractive physically an in my personality and have no trouble getting a guy to date me, but I can't seem to hook them. They always end up looking at me like I'm just for fun, never long-term. I desperately want a relationship that leads to a lifetime together, yet I know I have trouble opening up at the critical point in the dating cycle, which I've come to realize is around week 3. I have literally had 6 relationships in the past 2 years and each guy has told me they don't want anything long-term (or don't have those feelings for me), and right after we break up, they find a girlfriend. It's insane and it's driving me insane. I can't correct this defect, I've tried, but every time a relationship fails I just retreat even more and become less able to be vulnerable.

So what is the solution? I have also tried all the suggestions of being sociable, helpful, joining groups, reading books on dating and social skills. What do we do when none of that works? Even religion fails in this area.

I have learned from reading forums that women are attracted to the aggressive abusive type. That's why the jerks always win all the women they want. Evolution has programmed us this way because Darwin was right. It is survival of the fittest. Those aggressive genes are attractive and those are traits meant to be passed on.

Our genes are not meant to be passed on for those of us who are nicer and wiser. Sorry I don't have any good news for anyone here. Though I am happy to join this group of sad saps. We are not alone. That's a plus!

I wonder about that too. What do we when nothing works? What do we do when all that we have tried, when everything that has been suggested ... and with a so-called guarantee that it will work ... just don't. When we don't fit in to the clubs and groups. When we don't belong in the classes, or at work. When there's nobody to connect with at the library, or the gym. When we don't meet anyone while we are out for a walk. When we get ignored at volunteering, shouted at, even turned away ....

All anyone says is to keep trying. Yet, there comes a point where we have nothing left to try with.

We have each other. We join our own group; this group! This is where we belong!!

I agrre 100% with you. We can put ourselves out there as much as we want but that doesnt mean we gonna meet somebody, I hate when people tell me that.

Cursed boy !!!
Thats why You need to act now ...not some day !!!!!!
and stop calling Yourself cursed ....there is many ppl who would like to be as
"cursed "as You are .....
go to the disabled forum for example and see how many ppl are sick and would love to have Your life for few days ....stop thinking like that ...cause invisible feast will punch You right now /mine/

thats amazing !
omg its so easy to meet people ......You have to open Yourself to it and go to some social gatherings ..if You all do not drink maybe go to a library for an event there or do some sort of courses/like anything real estate whatever./
where You go meet ppl ,travel if You have money ...give an add on a craigs list You are looking for a gym buddies ,join hiking group,dance class,painting class ...go take a dog for a walk in a near animal shelter and who knows maybe U will meet someone nice there ....there are very frendly ppl there with big hearts from my experience .......
come on You guys...dont b shy !!!
T o d a y start thinking that everyone is Your friend !!!!!!!!!!
do it !!!!!! its really very easy to meet new people ...and I dont care how shy You think You re ....Im really shy but I dont care ......I like to talk ......

stop thinking about Yourself that You are awkward and nobody wants You etc NOW

i guarantee 100 % its not true !!!!!!!!
..what a stupid thoughts .!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
....replace them with Im easy going and open a lot even when You do not have to!!!!!!!dont complain...joke ....
be pleasant and ppl will come running to You .....
please post how its all changing for You .....

I’m 24 and I have never kissed a guy let alone dated one. Everyone (well except guys) say that I am pretty, beautiful as well as smart and funny. I am never mean to people, I’m polite and always try to help others (I don’t know about the States, but in Eastern Europe, where I come from, those are seen as good traits). It’s not that I am waiting for a prince on a white horse and refusing to go out with a guy who isn’t in some way perfect – no one has simply ever asked me out, ever. I would like to find my equal though, who sees the world and life like I do. One girl (not my friend, I really don’t have friends, more like acquaintances) said that men are simply afraid of me cause I don’t have any faults – don’t drink, smoke, use drugs, etc. From what I’ve read here - it’s the good people who are the ones with problems finding a partner- well I suppose that most on this planet are simply stupid, weak, addicted to smth bad, or are mean and cruel, and we, the weird ones, are just too few, so we often are and feel alone and out of place. When I was younger (in my teens) I hoped that when I will grow up it will be easier to find someone, that men will be more mature and not all idiots with the only purpose to use me for sex. Now that I am 24 I’m slowly loosing my hopes. Maybe some people are not made for love. I’m thinking of devoting myself to constant studies and seeing what the fate has planed for me. Good luck to all of you – who knows, maybe some of us will eventually find true love. If not – there’s always the next life.

Exact same situation! No one ever talks to me on the internet or in person, even my own family doesn't want me around. I am nice to people and I am trying to be friends but no one wants to be friends with me at all. It's like I don't exist, kind of feel like a ghost, abandoned and forgotten. I see everyone around me with friends and a relationship with someone but I will never have that. Strange thing to, even in my dreams girls aren't interested. It's a living hell but I guess it is nice to know I am not the only one that shares such misery, alone and unwanted.

Yeah, me too.

I've had a few girlfriends, but never anything real. Only cheaters. No love, only lies and treachery. Dishonesty rules in this world.

I've been alone MUCH more than I've been with anyone. I've been alone for 5 years again now. I don't smoke, drink, or do drugs, and that makes it HARD to find someone compatible. Almost everybody does at least one of those, and so do all their friends, so I'm out. I have a very nice home, a successful business, and am nice looking. I'm honest to a fault, thoughtful, helpful, and generous. I'm very, very kind and polite and courteous and respectful and respectable, but none of that stands for anything. I'm 47 now, and I guess destined to die alone.

I am SO sick and tired of people telling me 'the right one will come along'. Well, if the right one hasn't come along in 29 years of being an adult, she's sure not likely ever to now.

I have almost no family at all (they're all dead), and only a very small handful of friends who are practically never around. I live my life pretty much completely alone, and am now turning into a recluse, and depression is finally taking over. I no longer watch my diet or exercise; just go right to bed after work, and have become addicted to the internet out of boredom or lonliness or both.

At least reading all this, I know I'm not alone in my experience, even though I'm alone in my life.

Seems like this will be me in 10 years. I hate it when people say "The right one will come along", or "You'll find someone one day". It might be OK to say those types of things to a 12 year old, or a 16 year old, or even to someone in their early 20's. But now, they are just words. Simple, cold, words, that carry the same emotional meaning as someone saying that they don't care, and won't try.

I suppose the difference is that I find the internet, by and large, quite boring and very lonely too. Unless I'm specifically looking up information on something, I don't seem to fit in with any online groups, and with out anyone to talk to online, it's quite a lonely place.

yea! this is me here too ! I am always thinking what is wrong with me all my friends similar to me they got married and they have kids but it seems nobody wants me ! I feel like a old salad sitting in the counter which nobody wants to touch it ! anyway i live my life lonely ! i tried to dream sometimes it works specially when i am going to sleep ! about my life as a family I even start talking to my imaginary kids!!! but morning oh no i wake up with a 100 IB on my chest! very heavy pain of emptiness, feeling so unwanted ! anyway I believe i am extra in this world! some people like me are not welcomed to this world !the only wish I have is to have enough power to end this misery one day in morning !

It's not fair. i feel like yesterdays trash,i've done nothing wrong.i am my own biggest fool to think someone will even look my way..I feel this way because i feel like a so worthy of another chance.These days theres no time for a sweet guy..My Heart and My Muscle are two different cells,neither wanna give up!

Wow. I'm feeling lonely so I do a search on "nobody wants me" and I find all these others with the same situation. At least now I don't feel as alone. Thanks.

I can't understand this life in general. As good **** always happen to ******* bad people in both sexes and nice ones finish last, or they never finish at all. I'm thinking I'm an alien or something that landed on a wrong planet. From my early day when I feel different about me than other people I tried to understand humans. Yet it is still in vain. As I learned the ways of the human world, others went on their races, had 4 or 5 digit jobs, got a degree (they had money to do that before getting a job!), have a girlfriend, have a car, nice home, etc. They are shocked (if not laughing inside) when I said I never had a girlfriend. I tried to be like them and not an iota of success like them. Then a realization came to me "**** them, I have better things to do". I stopped my search. I don't know whether I'll find a life partner or not, but I accept whatever life brings me. Then you'll say "you have to work for what you want". Sure, I'm working on my dreams and purposes, but not for this. Anyway, life goes on. 8664 days since landing on this unknown planet.

don't give up!

It is a horrible feeling being alone and knowing you always will be. Some days I feel ok but most other days I feel this deep emptiness and it actually hurts inside, literally. Makes no sense why girls don't like me, I treat them nice but maybe to nice and like what most of you are saying which is true, they always go for the a**hole. Life certainly is unfair, why can't we have the one we love so much and rid of this pain that hurts so much. :-(

wishing cant make it so. theys 2 options suicide or survive and adapt. be selfish pursue what else can mae you happyin life. dont be mainstream if you dont have long as it doesnt hurt anybody else and you respect and love those that love you.. do whatever you want to.. because unfortunately peoplejsut arent going to change and we arent stupidenough to be fobbed off by cliches " oh they's someone for everybody" "you have a great personality" blah blah blah. lol... tonight for me. jack daniels.. ***********..and maybe some takeaway... live foryour own pleasure. nice people get **** on. and people rarely say what they mean cos they wanna appear to be nice all the time. the chicks especially most of the time. the ****** are at least far more honest.

I have the same experience and have been going through it for years and years. The feeling of not being wanted since childhood, has placed a deep hole inside of me. The sense of abandonment and lack of love, makes me cry myself to sleep almost every night. I have cried so many tears over the years. Ever since I was 14 I have dealt with the rejection, not just on a romantic scale, but trying to make friends too. Even my family doesn't care. I care enough about myself, but it's heart wrentching to know no one else does.

well we've always got face book and youtube

You took the words right out of my mouth...just replace "girl" with "guy", of course.

even tough we are many of our kind, we are all alone in our lone house, in our lone life, in our lone world. i use to have a friend who get hookups every montus or so, i just can't onow how he does... im 15, never kissed a girl, never was wanted by any girls, will never be aswell... i've been trying so hard to get a girl to love me that i dont even know why im still hanging in that lone chance of love while she's maybe getting banged by a ****** who doesn't give a **** of her! i cried so many times in this short life that i dont dven feel the falling tears on my face when i get to. as everyone say: we will get loved one day" it wont happen for the majority of us. those peoples are helpless, they wont stop telling you the same thing again and again! and that's the worse of it. they are loved, they just can't understand the real feeling of loneliness and they will never! my name is maxime, from charlevoix in the canada, i dont give a **** if people recognise me here (why the heck would they get here anyway) the feeling of being lone will just replenish itself as they will turn the page and look over other. i think of ending it often those times (hard times in fact) i have no regret of being that sad, anyway, who will ever help me? love me?? why? because peoples tells me ( and for sure they does for you too, so why would you be there anyway) that im ugly, that i better go for a date with the ugliest, that im desespered case. but no. i would better be alone and proud of it than lone and sad with someone i dont like. i think that every's question here today is: why is ithqppening to me?! well, there is no answer to that, really... there will not be any help from around me (and you) and we all know that. now you can comment on my message, i dont think any will notice it anyway...

I thought I'm alone ... Well I think I'll die an old virgin...

I feel the same why I'm in high school and no one wants to go out with me I'm ugly and pointless. There is this girl named Sydney that I like in my 6th period class my friend said she likes me but she is always flirting with my friend and its just sad because I really like her but know she probably likes him owell I have no use to keep trying.

Hmmmmm.... I could say I understand... I've never been successful looking for it, ever. But love has fallen into my lap a few times, so technically I've been luckier than you. But... all of them were finding me to be of use somehow. My wife, she wanted escape from her previous relationship. That has been a major strain on us... and now at the end, it made the fatal blow to our marriage easy to land. Before her, my ex girlfriend, she was a rich kid who was just acting out a normal life, not really having one. I was little more than a plaything to keep her from getting bored in the end... So, maybe I've been a bit luckier, but I'm also in a lot of pain for having been so lucky. Don't feel too bad... right now I envy you having loneliness because you are simply alone... being lonely when you're supposed to be mated to someone who doesn't care about you... you don't want to go there, friend.

Trust me, you're not the only one. I see the same thing day in and day out. I am so flipping sick of being told that it will happen or that I will find a "good woman." I've been trying for 20 years, and I would have a better chance of stepping on the only landmine in Central Park.

Women always say they want a good man, but I have yet to meet one who really means it. They always go for the "bad boy" who in the end will always hurt them one way or the other.

A guy I went to high school with was the classic "bad boy," but he was never hurting for dates, hookups, or girlfriends. They never lasted, but he always had more. Eventually he ended up going to jail for six months for breaking a woman's arm during a fit of rage. For the record, I did not associate with him, but he was well known in town so what he was doing was not a secret.

His next girlfriend was this woman who could not have weighed more than 90lbs soaking wet and probably just 5ft. tall. He was around 6'2 or 6'3 IIRC and built like a tank. Anyway, he beat her so badly that she ended up in the hospital for a month and he got sent to state prison for around 18 months on a plea bargain. When he got out, she was waiting for him. Less than six months later, he beat her to death. Thankfully he is now rotting in prison for the rest of his wretched life.

For some reason, women in our current culture have been raised to go for the lowest common denominator when it comes to men. Perhaps it is what they see on TV and in the movies; I don't know.

Hah..hah..funny ..I like the ending ...I am sorry , for the part that the girl was beaten to death ... But .. THIS IS TRUE happen here too.. This good looking man that I knew ...married to a sexy , out going girl in my small village ... then she left him for someone richer (I guess)... he begs her to come back..the best thing is she is expecting his child ...she ran off and after giving birth, asked for a divorce .. I think he's nearly mad ... At last he found happiness in a very simple, plain woman who wears a long headgear (cover up from head to toe) .. and they live happily ever after ......the end.. he..he..

I totally feel you. I'm 37 years old and feel that I'm pretty. I am successful, compassionate, charming, confident, and yet even if I can get a guy on a date and I like him he disappears. I honestly don't know what's wrong with me. I try to be a positive person but sometimes I just feel so defeated. I have amazing friends and everyone is shocked that I am still single. I just want someone who I can be myself with; who will look into my eyes and see me for who I am. Ugh. I don't know what to do.

Yeah. I get tired of heading that I have a great personality though. It's annoying. It's what people say to you when they don't think you're pretty.

I feel the same way. I've prayed to God and nothing. I feel I'm pretty and have something's going for myself, but I never get asked out. Yesterday my friend told me in order to get the guy I want I should send him a picture of my breasts. Why should I cheapen myself. I'm tired of watching my friends get married, go on dates, have options.....while I cannot even get the 50 year old guy I like and I'm 31. What's that say? Even if someone 20 years older than me doesn't want me....who would right. I asked God when I woke up, does He care that I cry myself to sleep?

Well, I hope you don't listen to your friends so called 'advice'. You shouldn't have to do something like that to "get" a guy.

I hear you there cursedboy,

I had it all once, the job, the trophy wife even after divorce, the trophy girlfriend. I started working when i was 13, YEP 13, and even paid into the tax system then. When I made money hand over fist I had friends, a woman, and family. NOW however, I have been on SSDI as a result of a back injury sustained in the concrete business. Now, Nothing, not a dad gum thing! No Job (i.e. money) means, No girl, no friends, and yep, even family has turned their backs (for the most part anyway)... Sad, but true, people are always chasing the buck... So much for the cliché' "Money can't buy love" I say BS, money buys EVERTHING! BTW, FYI, My Concrete Co. Used to gross 4.3 Million a year (everyone was my friend) and now I live on 28K per year (and not a soul in sight)
I don't care what anyone say's... My problems would end if I had the winning Lotto numbers... (Just saying)

I don't think winning lotto and having money would solve all your problems. Would your friends be your friends because they like you for who you are? Or would they be your friend because they just think you'll throw some of your money their way?

Might be an out-dated view these days, but, I think friends should be friends no matter what a persons financial status is. Or their marital status. Or their religion. Or the colour of their skin. Or their weight. Or their height ....

Money can't buy friends. Or love. Not the real thing anyway.

Huh. Strange to think that I wrote this 4 years ago. Almost to the day. Well, 4 years and 1 day ago. Yet it's still true. Even on the internet, all I seem to find is lies and manipulation and people playing games with emotions .... Still haven't had my first kiss. Or a cuddle. Or even held hands. Or even been out with anyone. I'm just ... worthless. Unwanted.

same feelin bro,it's like we were destined to die alone or's very depressing to see and/or hear people who just can't win any women's hearts at all.I am a averagely handsome kind of guy,was diagnosed with asperger's syndrome(mild for of autism),which never really affected me,im good at singing,and i respect and be kind to kind people.I just can't seem be loved in return.thanks cupid,thanks a lot

I'm right there with ya... :(.. This is one example of Life is Unfair

the mexican drug lord thanked the US for making drugs illegal because it made him rich. Here i am poor and disabled and can't even afford to keep the one i love most alive. The US spends billions of dollars on the drug war. war should be illegal. instead they can't help a poor man that doesn't have enough to keep his dog. while soldiers aren't even court martialed for shooting dogs. im glad if i die ill leave this place and im glad my dog doesn't understand.

I end up on this page cause of a google search even though my issues are a bit different than most people here. But I was concerned when I read your post. Lets say I don't care much for people but have a soft spot for animals. I have a cat myself and is been there for me through my depression sadness and problems. Is sometime ago you wrote this but if is not too late I would like to help if I can. With your dog I mean. I know what a treasure a pet can be to their owner especially when you're sou rounded by cruel stupid and ungrateful people. Let me know honey.