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Nobody Wants Me

My love is not good enough. Any girl I have had a crush on. Any girl that's I've liked. Anyone I've loved .. or even wanted to love .. has made that perfectly clear. Nobody wants me. Nobody wants to touch me. Nobody .. my love isn't wanted. I'm not wanted. Oh of course, I've heard people say that someone will ..... but it never happens. Watch others find someone. Watch them cheat, be abusive, and they get another chance. And then another. And another. I can't even find someone to hold. Can't find my first, ever, kiss. Nobody will try ... which says so much more than any cliche about waiting. Nobody will try, not even an internet relationship ... even here, nobody wants me ...

Cursedboy Cursedboy 36-40, M 87 Responses Nov 5, 2008

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Well I am facing the same situation. Never dated anyone or let's say nobody ever wanted to date me. Maybe because i am very serious about my career and it's just didn't happen for other person to think of me as someone they wanna date. But then i feel lonely and there's just no one to share my feelings with. I am not desperate to meet someone but not at a good point either to say i am enjoying my life.

OK, but you're a 25 year old female.

He's a 40 year old male.

It's a lot tougher for men than women to find someone that loves them. It's a lot tougher for a man to be approached by a woman that loves him than it is for a woman to be approached by a man that loves her.

Most women will always be approached by men MUCH MORE OFTEN than men will be approached by women. Men just fall in love with women faster or easier than women fall in love with men. If women fell in love with men as fast as men fall in love with women, there would be very few single women and multitudes of divorced men.

Hell, in my life I fell hard enough for 5 different women that they all knew what I felt about them but I never kissed any one of them on the lips ever. Not one woman. Not one time.

Same here. :L
I'd be a really good boyfriend, I'm caring, Loving and been told im a great guy. I have had NO luck with people in my day to day that i have been attracted to so i tried internet dating and no one will even view/reply to anything i send. I even have people make sly jokes about the way i look at work, people dont even want there coats after if mine has touche theres. Whenever i say "i'll help you out" they always reply "please dont". I'm literally so ugly that no one wants to be my friend let alone date me. :'(

My story is your story. you are not alone.

Okay, so i sat here procrastinating a lot of my uni work, wondering how it has been 2 years, countless dates and still no man to really appreciate me in the same way as i have treated them.
From a womans point of view, it is just as hard to be noticed as it is for a man, infact, it is actually harder, I'm a pretty motivated, strong and independent chick and whilst quite intelligent with a great positive personality I find it still just incredibly hard to find the right guy for me, or have someone that actually loves me instead of just likes me because I'm a nice girl but could never imagine themselves with me or 'doesn't want anything serious right now' constant excuses to make it seem like a nice way of saying, I only like you because you're good in bed.
I often question what it takes to meet somebody who sees you more then just an object, or how long I'll have to wait until i get the really feel and understand what love feels like and not just being stuck in lust. I often feel as though everytime i have a good feeling about someone going somewhere, it often doesn't. What does this mean for me? This is just something I'll never understand but I often feel quite lonely and broken on the inside and for someone who holds such a strong facade, I strive for happiness that isn't art or narcotics. I strive for happiness that i can share with somebody else, instead of just myself.
Anyway, Cursedboy, I know exactly how you feel, I understand that need, but remember, women feel the same desire too, they just don't know how. men and women are exactly the same, they are just as scared as eachother. somebody will want you, and somebody will want me too. I think only time will tell. time hurts, but sometimes things happen for a reason

Well, melbo123, I could say that at least you're dating. That's further than I ever get. Can I ask you something? Do you date guys that are always of the same type? Because you say that the guys you have dated have said that they "don't want anything serious right now" (a b/s line, imo, whether from a man or a woman), maybe you should try going out with a guy who isn't of the usual type you would go for. Sort of, think outside the box, so to speak. Huh, I wish I could follow this too, but, as I said, I don't even get to dating stage. Barely even get a polite response to a greeting, to be honest.

I guess I know that there are women out there that must be going through the same thing. It's just that, any that I encounter seem to be waiting for a George Clooney type to show up. Or, at least, not me. I'm not saying that men aren't the same, that there aren't a lot out there waiting to meet a Jennifer Hawkins look-a-like or something. I guess a fault of society is that most people tend to go for someone who will impress their friends most of all.

Huh. 'Somebody will want you .. " That might have worked 20 years ago (and even only barely then), but now, it's only a collection of words.

hmm.. Cursedboy, you definitely made me reflect on the men that have been in my life, I've dated the 'mr tall, dark and handsomes', of the world, but i'm not sure what my 'type' is i guess, i generally just go with what the chemistry is like, because chemistry is very important to any relationship but i guess if you are asking in a sense of aesthetics, well, all the men i have ever dated have all been quite attractive, but their beauty on the inside always made them so much more attractive but that beauty on the inside, it has gotten to a point where i question the trust i have in myself and the person i am with, how much i trust my own judgement, how much i trust them and whether i am analyzing things far too early (which typically is something women are incredible at). i tend to steer clear from your typical wanky bloke and have only really been with men i thought were honest but they all seemed quite unstable.
women are looking for somebody who can hold their head up high, confidence and stability, they are the three most attractive things wayy before looks are remotely considered. when there is no baggage, it is almost a no brainer that this should be it, but people find dating as a game and some people can be plain rude. im lucky that in my 22 years of life, i've only felt lustful feelings for a man and that im lucky my time has never been wasted for no longer then a year and it has only happened three times.
i see the pros and cons of being single everyday, i sit and wonder who my prince charming will ever be, but i have one rule, once i am screwed around the first time, there is literally just one chance because i don't like wasting my time. so patience is a virtue as some would say, and in this love game, patience is essential. until then, my belief is that life has to happen first before a successful relationship can fall into place because if you are never happy with yourself then you'll never find someone who can reflect that happiness off you.

I feel the same pain, I'm 25 and spent the about the last 10 years trying to get a date with only 2 results. I feel like a monster and people keeping telling me I'm good looking and that ill find someone but no one ever likes me.
And to make things worse I feel in love with my friend but she dont feel the same way about me and just wants to be friends.
No one seems to understand how much it hurts, i even feel pain in my heart that follows down my arm and though my fingers.
I dont have a soul mate :(

but why?
You just too nice ? ...to sensitive ......too caring?...
too desperate?...
my father was married 4 times ...had women coming thorough the windows...lol.... and he was just a selfish ,cold guy.... yet women adored him.......crazy
sadly a lot of women a r e drawn to arrogant, selfish men.....
I'll give You that.....
the deal here is not to show what do You really feel
,keep it cool ....no pressure .....no commitment .....

have few girlfriends at the same time !!!!
so women see You are popular ..its all a theater here
...go out to the movies on friday with Susan ,and then go out for lunch with Maggie on sunday ....D: .......enjoy life .......
,heck I would buy a motorcycle and ride it ...screw stupid women.....
.

pull out tarot cards here on U ...and first card which come out..../Yes I'm a tarot cards reader/.....D:
is 7 cups...which indicates U r not seeings things clearly ,clouded judgment ,You are misinterpreting reality ,wishing for something doesn't make it happen ...there are however many more options open!!!!...... then You recognize .....
so thats like Your fist card .......You can read more about it google 7 cups....
You will start few new things ,good energy

http://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/casanovas-principles-sex-and-seduction

it is complicated ...........and it is tough world ..........there is only that many attractive ppl with good heart a lot of others are very artificial and selfish...
and often these who are good looking are very difficult and spoiled but not always......

there are folks who don't look that great and also can b pretty evil....lol.......
I think You just need to be patient and careful ,
and maybe try to go for a type You normally dont go sometimes...
it may be surprisingly good ..........D:...
don't loose hope ....h e must be somewhere ........!!!

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you know i had that problem for a long time myself man. and i still struggle with getting women to like me let alone love me i'm an assholeish arrogant ***** who hides behind a wall of machoness to hide how afraid i actually am of rejection, but i still go out there i still decide everyday that when i see a pretty girl im gonna try to impress her show her how im different if it doesn't work then she's probally a hoe anways. thats kinda how i had to start looking at this picture women don't want a guy that's just going to sit back and wait for things to happen because if you don't act at some point and decide at some point that you are worth having a pretty girl love you than you never will. and every word of this is true in highschool i was a jock i was good at football and still no girls liked me because of my niceness. this all changed at 19 though when i literally changed my entire mindset in order to prove to at least one girl that looked halfway decent i was worth something and college was my chance. everyday at the end of dinner in the mess hall i would go from table of girls to table of girls trying to get numbers and meet people till i found a girl i knew i could get. too bad she was a total hoe and cheated on me with other dudes and made me jealous with her past which only made me upset and feel insecure about myself which is something to watch out for btw. but the point is you can't quit because if you do you're only letting yourself down. now ive slept with one other girl since then (fling one night stand) and i turn up at the club trying to find a mate when i can but i take it one day at a time and i never lose hope or quit although i know it could be quite a long time till my next relationship or screw. sorry if this is a bit of a reality shock but this is pretty much the truth in a nutshell. don't be just that friend set yourself apart from friend status, if a girl aint giving you the kind of attention you want then you give her nothing of your precious time or energy cause nothing in life is worth getting no reward out of im sorry. i hope this helps some of you guys out there i know that reading this post has given me some hope cause i least i know im not in this struggle alone.

Im 21.. I had my heart stomped on many occasions... and also have a hard time finding a girl to actually love me...I know it may seem extreme to say this..but after so many years feeling unloved..I often think of suicide due to the agony of being alone...

I feel you man. I have never experienced love, and i dont think i ever will. People just dont seem to like me.

Thank you..venting doesn't really help or change..but I guess it's a start..

But if its the only thing left on your mind and you do not have any options left.
I would love to have some friends that at least passed the ball over to me so to speak but I learned too late what true friends are and that you should not be nice to people that do not deserve it or have done something that guarantees you it will pay off.

awwwwww

I understand, and honestly, I get the same thought and feelings sometimes. Most people don't understand it. They think that, if you want to be touched, if you want to be 'loved', just go and pay for it. They don't understand that that isn't love. It isn't being loved. It's not giving love. It's not sharing love. And to me, a life with out love isn't a life that I want to live. That I do it every day is bad enough as it is ....

I paid for love not too long ago. It made me feel so empty.. then they say do online dating...pfft yeah right...they'll date you for a day then find someone better...

That's exactly why I won't go and just pay for it. It just seems so false.

I've never had success with online dating either. Never had a response or a reply. Now I'm starting to get emails from the dating sites saying that they are going to delete my profile because of a lack of activity. Yeah. I wonder why I haven't been active on them ....

it could be worst ......I know many ppl living in the most miserable marriages where they can't divorce /kids,money issues/ and they live loveless lives without any hope for the better ...

by the way You may want to go to energy healer and try to unblock Your chakras ,particularly first chakra and heart chakra it could have immediate pos effect on Your life....

Anyone can leave a relationship they don't want to be in.

You are only 21 for God sake ...
buy Yourself a motorcycle and have fun...screw stupid girls who don't want You ......

How exactly do you screw someone who doesn't want you? I'm sorry, but in my book, that's called rape.

I meant dont care about ppl who dont want You ...lol.. not "screw " ...

anyway I was researching the subject further more ...lol....
and there is a lot of info on the web now ...but some basics about successful dating are :

if this is all annoying ..pls never mind ....!!!!..I'm just writing this for others so they may benefit from it and understand it ..........

- You have to love Yourself somehow ,even if You do not like Yourself at this moment .... You need to discover how to like yourself more ...

if You truly like Yourself others will see that .....its a must....!
Dont tell them You were unsuccessful ....U have to convince Yourself and them that You are a " catch" ........D:
also U have around 2 seconds when a person sees U to make great first impression....
looking straight in her eyes /u can look at the bridge of nose if U dont like looking in the eyes/ standing straight with big smile on the face its a m u s t ..!


- You have to be happy on Your own somehow/or at least pretend it lol/ ....its very important ....!!! other ppl will enhance Ur life but You are ultimately responsible for Ur own happiness....others will see it right away .......

- again You have to have Your own passions /hobbies ....be passionate about something ...girl will think ...hhmm what an interesting guy ....he has a lot going on ...its good to hang out with him...he is not one of those boring ones ...
/there must be something U like golf,scuba,cars ,good books anything/.....

- more You want the girl ..more power You give her ....that person rules in a relationship who cares less ......less U care .....less confident they feel about You and actually want to chase You and get U ....
try not to show desire ....

- dating /women its a numbers game .....more women You contact ,meet ,date
bigger chance You have for a relationship ....Don't ever focus on one only keep meeting,dating many of them ...having social life is very important ..big plus others will see it and again will find U interesting....

- being funny ,physically fit ,good hygiene ,nice clothes is an obvious things
also having some good skills in bed its a plus ....

there is a tone of info on the web ......
there are tips on how to have good first date and how to attract ppl ...
its like sales .....You are a product You are trying to sell.....
there are many technics for it ,,,,
ppl who do not bother learning these technics will not be successful "sellers "
there are many folks like you but having more knowledge can give You a lot of power.......

U r welcome !!!

-

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Well ... before even answering the thread i have to say, i in a fit of annoyance and bad feelings typed into google "why does no-one wish to date me" ... this thread was one of the first items on that list and i was curios and read through both your comments and most of the replies. I had never heard of this site before and never been near but now i have a profile and that is thanks to you and the folks below who i wish to offer a response or at the very my respect for speaking out. However to the original post i say this ... I know how you feel. I am a 26 year old guy who has never once been in a relationship and never once found anyone who sees me as anything other than a friend, no matter how i feel. The truly awful fob off of someone saying "stop trying so hard and it'll happen" or the ever wonderful "there's someone out there for you, just not me" ... they **** me off and make me angry now as in 26 years i have never had someone return my feelings, i am (i hope and like to think) a likable guy and i have a lot of female friends but out of those no-one likes me other than a friend even if i feel more. I can live with this because when i take a step back i'd rather they be happy, than with me however just like yourself Cursedboy .... i wonder, wish, lament and get severely depressed or pissed off at times wondering if it will ever happen for me. I too have met women in abusive relationships who constantly confound and confuse me by returning to the same guy over and over ... I just wish that those women i have met in bad relationships would look beyond their usual "type" and see the guys out there who maybe they generally ignore and think; for once maybe something different with someone who won't use me would be great.I have no answer to your problem as i haven't found one myself. But i can say if i ever find the answer that works for me ... i'll let you know in case it may someday work for you too

You're so right with those sayings. "Stop trying so hard and it will happen", is just so infuriating, mainly because if you do stop trying, it's assumed that you have given up and aren't interested anymore. "There's someone out there for you ..." feels like some line that is given to heartbroken teenagers. Not adults. That line barely gave me any comfort when I was 18, now at 38 it's just a cold collection of words.

Ever notice how all these sayings are always, or at least often, said by people who are in relationships?

Cursedboy I am right there with you. That feeling that nobody wants your love. No one has tried and those who did walked away without warning. It really does make you wonder if something is wrong with you and why nobody wants my love.

I wrote this 6 years ago, and it is even more relevant now than it was back then ....

Been singing the same song for 5 years. If I'm so great why does nobody want my love? It's getting harder to date. People don't understand why I've been single my whole life. There must be something wrong with me. But to be honest I'm beginning to think that maybe there is something wrong with me. The universe really is playing a cruel trick on me.

To someone my own age and the opposite gender ... i can only offer commiserations :( ... we are all in the same boat in this thread ... I mean, seriously? ... what the hell is so wrong with us that no-one wants to see as more than friends ??? ... surely there is at least one person out there who could love us? ... myself i feel like i am a damaged person physically because i have two mechanical valves in my heart and emotionally because the condition that made me get the valves also cost me some very close family members ... but surely after fighting off those odds there would be someone who could the person inside ? ... so far apparently not :(

i feel the same sometimes just gotta push through

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Hugs. Yeah, I totally hear you.

I understand where you coming from because im in the same situation as you. You just gotta learn to move on in your life if nobody wants you its their loss thats whats wrong with women today they dont want a good man, You sound like a great guy just keep your head up man dont worry about it. thats what im doing.

That's a bit offensive that you say women don't want good men. I, for one, haven't even been asked out in 6 years and even then I only ever turned one person down for a date *in middle school*. We just have bad luck it's not "women today".

it's got nothing to do with bad luck. it's all got to do with self confidence and how well you can bounce back to that confident state when the pressure is on male or female.

Self confidence isn't something that you can just conjure up, or pluck out of the sky whenever you want or need it. And it's not something that anyone else can tell you you have, or don't have, or how to get it. 'Self' is a key word in there. And everyone finds their self confidence in different ways.

thats some real **** dog. literally want needs to be done in order to live happy as a male in this world.

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I hear you... I'm a 40 year old single dad, I adore my daughter, I run my own business, help run another, own a house and truck, college educated, active in volunteering for search and reasue as well as fire, sit on the board of a credit union and educate new families with habitat for humanity. However, I haven't dated in over a year because I always seem to be either just a temporary distraction or am the crutch to help a broken woman get back on her feet and then they move on to someone else when they can walk on their own... leaving me wondering WTF... So I've chalked it up to Occam's razor, all things being equal the simplest answer is the correct one which means the problem is with me so I figure why even bother getting involved with someone just to get knocked down again...

Did you ever find anyone? In the same boat and of the same age - only for even longer than you.

No. Still haven't found anyone. Not even a date ....

How about this - I am attractive physically an in my personality and have no trouble getting a guy to date me, but I can't seem to hook them. They always end up looking at me like I'm just for fun, never long-term. I desperately want a relationship that leads to a lifetime together, yet I know I have trouble opening up at the critical point in the dating cycle, which I've come to realize is around week 3. I have literally had 6 relationships in the past 2 years and each guy has told me they don't want anything long-term (or don't have those feelings for me), and right after we break up, they find a girlfriend. It's insane and it's driving me insane. I can't correct this defect, I've tried, but every time a relationship fails I just retreat even more and become less able to be vulnerable.

HI NoHopeLeftNow ... have to say whilst i don't know you personally, your situation sounds like many of my female friends. They generally find someone on a night out drinking or dancing, they fall quickly in lust (certainly not love) and things go from there until the enevitable differences happen and they realise that this is not what they want, also usually occuring around 3 week mark you mentioned. The only thing i can advise from there is i was able to point three of my friends towards other friends and/or acquiantances they already that i also knew. They had known these guys for years but only in friendship terms, they had never noticed the similarities in their personalities or preferences before because they were blind to it for a multitude of reasons ... So after that mini (bugger almost sounded like a rant lol) story my only adivce would be to look closer at the friends you have now. If you find you still don't have an attraction to them specifically, then maybe try looking for someone with more of their combined qualities :)

it's no defect of yours you've just yet to find a suitable person to match your energies with. for a relationship to work both parties need to be ready for such a commitment and what it sounds like in this situation is that both you and the other person seem to want different things you want the guy to care enough about you to pursue the real you that is hidden behind a veil of disappointment and fear of not only your past relations, but any future chance you might have at settling down in the future. i think you'll be happy once you find someone caring enough to actually be with you and wait till your able to love him fully now he might have problems of his own, but when you really want to make it work with someone the path will be found.

Why would any self respecting man be coaxed into a long-term relationship with a ****.

how about You take next relationship very slow keep it cool .......do not show them You care so much even if You are dying inside ...try to become friends with them first and then take it to the next level...it will be hard to get rid of You when they will become emotionally attached to You .....
one night stands never really work.......

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So what is the solution? I have also tried all the suggestions of being sociable, helpful, joining groups, reading books on dating and social skills. What do we do when none of that works? Even religion fails in this area.

I have learned from reading forums that women are attracted to the aggressive abusive type. That's why the jerks always win all the women they want. Evolution has programmed us this way because Darwin was right. It is survival of the fittest. Those aggressive genes are attractive and those are traits meant to be passed on.

Our genes are not meant to be passed on for those of us who are nicer and wiser. Sorry I don't have any good news for anyone here. Though I am happy to join this group of sad saps. We are not alone. That's a plus!

I wonder about that too. What do we when nothing works? What do we do when all that we have tried, when everything that has been suggested ... and with a so-called guarantee that it will work ... just don't. When we don't fit in to the clubs and groups. When we don't belong in the classes, or at work. When there's nobody to connect with at the library, or the gym. When we don't meet anyone while we are out for a walk. When we get ignored at volunteering, shouted at, even turned away ....

All anyone says is to keep trying. Yet, there comes a point where we have nothing left to try with.

We have each other. We join our own group; this group! This is where we belong!!

After the post and response before i have too say i heartily agree with you both !!! and here here !! to the group of lads who whilst being beyond unlucky in love have found at some small comfort in knowing we aren't alone

we belong anywhere we feel like we belong

I agrre 100% with you. We can put ourselves out there as much as we want but that doesnt mean we gonna meet somebody, I hate when people tell me that.

it don't matter if you meet anybody or not believe it or not last night i went to the club and got rejected by almost every girl in the room who was single and i did not give one absolute **** because i am me and i am going to have fun regardless of what anybody thinks about it because the only person who can hurt me is me.

Yes, I need to know this as well!

dude you cant give a damn about what they think someone calls you fat be like ***** i bet you got a fat ***** and walk on like you aint said ****. cause at the end of the day your happiness is worth more than theirs or at least it should be.

if you believe You will get dumped ...You w i ll get dumped ...never!!! show any doubts to women...You are a catch !!!!!!!!....its Your new motto ......

also why not to give a chance to a women who is maybe a little heavier or maybe doesn't dress in a hottest way ...
You could help her to loose weight and end up getting a real beauty in the end......

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Cursed boy !!!
Thats why You need to act now ...not some day !!!!!!
and stop calling Yourself cursed ....there is many ppl who would like to be as
"cursed "as You are .....
go to the disabled passions.com forum for example and see how many ppl are sick and would love to have Your life for few days ....stop thinking like that ...cause invisible feast will punch You right now /mine/ .....lol

I'll stop calling myself 'cursed' when I no longer feel that I must be. Simply changing what I call myself on website has never had any effect on what happens off it, and therefore, nor on how I feel.

An invisible feast is rather intriguing though ....

stop feeling sorry for yourself trust me you will not regret it. once you stop giving a damn about your social anxiety and decide to have some fun even if it's just on the smallest of scales do it you'll love it.

And why assume that I don't do anything that I enjoy? Doing something fun is all well and good .... but eventually, at least for me, it gets to a point where I just want someone to share that fun with.

U got it ......its coming at You now ....can You see it ?.....ha,ha,ha....

but seriously ...why not to have few GF instead of one .......lol.....
enjoy life ,have fun.......get a motorcycle or a bicycle lol...go out in a sun ....laugh !!! ...be a magnet ...You already are !!!!!!!! start a blog !!!!!!!!!!

/get Yourself 5-htp supplement if You feel depressed ...lol...../
screw all who dont appreciate You ...........!!!!!!!!!!!!!You are a great man,sensitive and caring ....!

You will find love ..just believe ....You deserve it !!!!
do not get negativity hold You down...sometimes we have to wait long time to appreciate good things ........
it may be just a Your karmic lesson......very annoying....lol

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thats amazing !
omg its so easy to meet people ......You have to open Yourself to it and go to some social gatherings ..if You all do not drink maybe go to a library for an event there or do some sort of courses/like anything real estate whatever./
where You go meet ppl ,travel if You have money ...give an add on a craigs list You are looking for a gym buddies ,join hiking group,dance class,painting class ...go take a dog for a walk in a near animal shelter and who knows maybe U will meet someone nice there ....there are very frendly ppl there with big hearts from my experience .......
come on You guys...dont b shy !!!
T o d a y start thinking that everyone is Your friend !!!!!!!!!!
do it !!!!!! its really very easy to meet new people ...and I dont care how shy You think You re ....Im really shy but I dont care ......I like to talk ......

stop thinking about Yourself that You are awkward and nobody wants You etc NOW

i guarantee 100 % its not true !!!!!!!!
..what a stupid thoughts .!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
....replace them with Im easy going and open ...smile a lot ...help even when You do not have to!!!!!!!dont complain...joke ....
be pleasant and ppl will come running to You .....
please post how its all changing for You .....

Well, if all that works for you, then, good for you. But it's never worked like that for me.

do you ever leave your home? if you never go anywhere or do anything how can you expect anything to change in your life?

Of course I go out. What a stupid assumption to make about someone that you don't know. Just because someone doesn't have the same experiences as you do .. and I'm sorry if that is news for you. Or you just don't like your ignorance to be challenged.

What works for one person, won't always work for someone else. That's just life. Another sure sign of ignorance is expecting everyone to be the same as you.

LOVE THIS RIGHT HERE!!!!

How big of you.

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I’m 24 and I have never kissed a guy let alone dated one. Everyone (well except guys) say that I am pretty, beautiful as well as smart and funny. I am never mean to people, I’m polite and always try to help others (I don’t know about the States, but in Eastern Europe, where I come from, those are seen as good traits). It’s not that I am waiting for a prince on a white horse and refusing to go out with a guy who isn’t in some way perfect – no one has simply ever asked me out, ever. I would like to find my equal though, who sees the world and life like I do. One girl (not my friend, I really don’t have friends, more like acquaintances) said that men are simply afraid of me cause I don’t have any faults – don’t drink, smoke, use drugs, etc. From what I’ve read here - it’s the good people who are the ones with problems finding a partner- well I suppose that most on this planet are simply stupid, weak, addicted to smth bad, or are mean and cruel, and we, the weird ones, are just too few, so we often are and feel alone and out of place. When I was younger (in my teens) I hoped that when I will grow up it will be easier to find someone, that men will be more mature and not all idiots with the only purpose to use me for sex. Now that I am 24 I’m slowly loosing my hopes. Maybe some people are not made for love. I’m thinking of devoting myself to constant studies and seeing what the fate has planed for me. Good luck to all of you – who knows, maybe some of us will eventually find true love. If not – there’s always the next life.

you receive my first heart on this site ... i joined due to this thread and finding someone else own age who has near exactly the same outlook as mine is both refreshing and depressing ... so for what it is worth thank you and know that you are not alone.

I will say this though, devote yourself to your studies whatever they may be ... but leave at least some smal opening in the shell you are undoubtedly constructing, because one thing from i truly notice from this post is that we all still want someone to break through our respective shells and we the beauty inside and respect it ... itruly hope it happens for us all x

ok shoot how about this? if i ever meet you in person i'll take you out on a date being a 25 year old woman without having at least kissed someone is a sin and you sound cool enough to chill with, so if i ever find myself in eastern Europe i'll give you a call. ;)......(see it really is that easy to break the ice yall just gotta do it) regardless of the outcome.

Exact same situation! No one ever talks to me on the internet or in person, even my own family doesn't want me around. I am nice to people and I am trying to be friends but no one wants to be friends with me at all. It's like I don't exist, kind of feel like a ghost, abandoned and forgotten. I see everyone around me with friends and a relationship with someone but I will never have that. Strange thing to, even in my dreams girls aren't interested. It's a living hell but I guess it is nice to know I am not the only one that shares such misery, alone and unwanted.

Yeah, me too.

I have a few friends and I have a few family members, but otherwise, I do feel your pain utterly and completely. I feel invisible all the time. When I don't feel invisible, the attention feels negative, like I'm doing everything wrong.

do You love Yourself ?.......Do You think You are beautiful ..Do You think You deserve love and attention?...if You d o not think like that noone else will...the hardest thing is to convince Yourself that You are fantastic ...lol...and the whole world will follow ...its like magic..............!!!!!!

http://youtu.be/sp5dNfnDzLQ

I like that line: "It's like I don't exist, kind of feel like a ghost, abandoned and forgotten." I feel the same. Abandoned and forgotten. While the rest of the world moves on. More ****, more weed. Yes, another day. Gone. Tomorrow has already been written off. And the next day, too. And the next week, too. And the next month, too. There's always next year. But that will have to wait for almost another year as Fall is looming and Winter is on its heels. I may have committed suicide by now were it not for my mom. Because she's still alive, I won't do that. So then what? Parece que no le caigo bien a nadie. I don't even have friends, let alone a **** or a date or a girlfriend. WILL SOMEONE PLEASE **** ME and make me feel like you're actually into it? I can pay you. I can do your laundry. I'm getting tired. And old. Boredom has taken on new, heretofore undiscovered heights. Ugh. Ni vale la pena continuar escribir.

sometimes we have to grow up to certain things ...
this all very difficult and we have to have a lot of patience ..
and remember not all is gold what shines......

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I've had a few girlfriends, but never anything real. Only cheaters. No love, only lies and treachery. Dishonesty rules in this world.

I've been alone MUCH more than I've been with anyone. I've been alone for 5 years again now. I don't smoke, drink, or do drugs, and that makes it HARD to find someone compatible. Almost everybody does at least one of those, and so do all their friends, so I'm out. I have a very nice home, a successful business, and am nice looking. I'm honest to a fault, thoughtful, helpful, and generous. I'm very, very kind and polite and courteous and respectful and respectable, but none of that stands for anything. I'm 47 now, and I guess destined to die alone.

I am SO sick and tired of people telling me 'the right one will come along'. Well, if the right one hasn't come along in 29 years of being an adult, she's sure not likely ever to now.

I have almost no family at all (they're all dead), and only a very small handful of friends who are practically never around. I live my life pretty much completely alone, and am now turning into a recluse, and depression is finally taking over. I no longer watch my diet or exercise; just go right to bed after work, and have become addicted to the internet out of boredom or lonliness or both.

At least reading all this, I know I'm not alone in my experience, even though I'm alone in my life.

Seems like this will be me in 10 years. I hate it when people say "The right one will come along", or "You'll find someone one day". It might be OK to say those types of things to a 12 year old, or a 16 year old, or even to someone in their early 20's. But now, they are just words. Simple, cold, words, that carry the same emotional meaning as someone saying that they don't care, and won't try.

I suppose the difference is that I find the internet, by and large, quite boring and very lonely too. Unless I'm specifically looking up information on something, I don't seem to fit in with any online groups, and with out anyone to talk to online, it's quite a lonely place.

yea! this is me here too ! I am always thinking what is wrong with me all my friends similar to me they got married and they have kids but it seems nobody wants me ! I feel like a old salad sitting in the counter which nobody wants to touch it ! anyway i live my life lonely ! i tried to dream sometimes it works specially when i am going to sleep ! about my life as a family I even start talking to my imaginary kids!!! but morning oh no i wake up with a 100 IB on my chest! very heavy pain of emptiness, feeling so unwanted ! anyway I believe i am extra in this world! some people like me are not welcomed to this world !the only wish I have is to have enough power to end this misery one day in morning !

An old salad - those were the perfect words to describe how I feel these days.

I know. I hate those cliche statements. I wish I could sent each person who says such bullshit to the gulag. At least I find interesting stuff online, though. You should do drugs. They help immensely.

To you sir, whilst writing this i sit in a flat i have to leave due to health issues meaning i had to leave my current job, the flat i live alone in and have become depressing used too ... I may not be in your "actual" age group but i was considered an old man by the time i began drinking in pubs when i was 18 ... i have always been alone and have also nearly destroyed my own teeth by grinding the smeggers down when i hear the same falsified platitudes of "the right one will come along" or my personal favourite knife to the kidneys "maybe you're trying too hard, relax and it will happen"

So once again i raise the glass of red wine at my right hand and say to you dear sir and here is hoping that even if; romantically your life is not all you wish. That you find that happiness amongst good friends whether in person or online :)

Cheers to you !!

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It's not fair. i feel like yesterdays trash,i've done nothing wrong.i am my own biggest fool to think someone will even look my way..I feel this way because i feel like a monster.im so worthy of another chance.These days theres no time for a sweet guy..My Heart and My Muscle are two different cells,neither wanna give up!

Wow. I'm feeling lonely so I do a search on "nobody wants me" and I find all these others with the same situation. At least now I don't feel as alone. Thanks.

Same.

You appear to have done the same as me ... i'm not glad but i am comforted by the fact i'm not the only one and hope that we all find something to challenge or fufill our lives x

i know what you mean, but it takes strength to pull yourself out of this slump.

I can't understand this life in general. As good **** always happen to ******* bad people in both sexes and nice ones finish last, or they never finish at all. I'm thinking I'm an alien or something that landed on a wrong planet. From my early day when I feel different about me than other people I tried to understand humans. Yet it is still in vain. As I learned the ways of the human world, others went on their races, had 4 or 5 digit jobs, got a degree (they had money to do that before getting a job!), have a girlfriend, have a car, nice home, etc. They are shocked (if not laughing inside) when I said I never had a girlfriend. I tried to be like them and not an iota of success like them. Then a realization came to me "**** them, I have better things to do". I stopped my search. I don't know whether I'll find a life partner or not, but I accept whatever life brings me. Then you'll say "you have to work for what you want". Sure, I'm working on my dreams and purposes, but not for this. Anyway, life goes on. 8664 days since landing on this unknown planet.

To you who has found the strength and etermination to continue despite the overbearing social and personal pressures ... i truly salute you

don't give up!

**** off.

I agree with your sentiment ....

It is a horrible feeling being alone and knowing you always will be. Some days I feel ok but most other days I feel this deep emptiness and it actually hurts inside, literally. Makes no sense why girls don't like me, I treat them nice but maybe to nice and like what most of you are saying which is true, they always go for the a**hole. Life certainly is unfair, why can't we have the one we love so much and rid of this pain that hurts so much. :-(

A lot of people don't understand that loneliness can hurt, physically. I've even been to therapists that don't understand that. But then again, I've found that most therapists don't understand loneliness, period. I definatly go through times where the loneliness feels like something physical ... from feeling sick inside, to a coldness that I can't warm up, to feelings of ants and bug crawling over my skin, to having just no energy to do anything. All of those types of things.

Cursed, I have the truth here for you. The reason women avoid you is for a combination of things. This is the truth, coming from another "cursed" man. When you feel like you have that x-factor and **** just isn't working out. Here is what it is, first of all think about the women you are aiming for in an ideal world, who would you LIKE to be with you. If you imagine a 21 year old blonde, you're our of your mind. You're not too old though, believe me. You can always change your life. You will have to walk through the fire to lift the curse. I will explain that in a while. Your problems as I see them:

- Severely negative thoughts and life experiences (this is understandable, but still it is affecting your behaviour in an unattractive way)

- Your looks (loose your ******* weight! It will take 3~5 years of sweat. Just do it man. Your suffering already, might as well suffer in gym. get fit, groom impeccably, adopt an attractive look, since your facial structure isn't the best. Id recommend that you adopt a clean, instead of hot look. Looks always matter to women of any age, no matter what they say. This life is a contest, period. People will sympathise with you and then go back to playing the competition. Don't be that guy who thinks you're actually getting somewhere with sympathy. I'm here to deliver the truth.)

- Your mentalities, the biggest change that you need of all, is mental change. You will need to spend thousands of hours getting rejected, challenging yourself, approaching, failing, giving up, trying again. Losing hope. I guess you've already been doing that but the difference is that you haven't been taking enough risks changing. You need to discipline yourself, start going to the gym. Start meditating, sit down and think about your life your past, think about the competition, where you stand, think about how life has treated you, think about your hopes as a kid, think about everything, let it consume you. Evolve mentally, to the point where you can easily and casually engage any woman, fully accepted in any outcome objection or sex.

Your task ahead is like climbing many mount Everest's with a thousand kilos strapped to your back. No one can help you now but you.

I have the same experience and have been going through it for years and years. The feeling of not being wanted since childhood, has placed a deep hole inside of me. The sense of abandonment and lack of love, makes me cry myself to sleep almost every night. I have cried so many tears over the years. Ever since I was 14 I have dealt with the rejection, not just on a romantic scale, but trying to make friends too. Even my family doesn't care. I care enough about myself, but it's heart wrentching to know no one else does.

I feel like I've always had a hole in my soul too. As a little girl, I thought I had a missing twin or something. Although I've had relationships and friendships before, and have a few really great girls left, by and large, I always feel like a giant outcast, uncool, someone who just doesn't get being human and how it works.

me too but i no longer care about what they think i will still mingle and have fun because damn it if it's all ive got im gonna use it till i lose it.

SO **** EM CAUSE THEY ALL HOES DO YOU TURN UP LIVE EVERYDAY LIKE IT'S YOUR LAST AND DECIDE AT LEAST FOR YOURSELF THAT REGARDLESS OF ANYTHING ELSE THAT HAPPENS YOU ARE GOING TO BE HAPPY BECAUSE DAMN IT YOU DESERVE IT.

You took the words right out of my mouth...just replace "girl" with "guy", of course.

how about you replace single with me......yall see what i did there...still that easy

even tough we are many of our kind, we are all alone in our lone house, in our lone life, in our lone world. i use to have a friend who get hookups every montus or so, i just can't onow how he does... im 15, never kissed a girl, never was wanted by any girls, will never be aswell... i've been trying so hard to get a girl to love me that i dont even know why im still hanging in that lone chance of love while she's maybe getting banged by a ****** who doesn't give a **** of her! i cried so many times in this short life that i dont dven feel the falling tears on my face when i get to. as everyone say: we will get loved one day" it wont happen for the majority of us. those peoples are helpless, they wont stop telling you the same thing again and again! and that's the worse of it. they are loved, they just can't understand the real feeling of loneliness and they will never! my name is maxime, from charlevoix in the canada, i dont give a **** if people recognise me here (why the heck would they get here anyway) the feeling of being lone will just replenish itself as they will turn the page and look over other. i think of ending it often those times (hard times in fact) i have no regret of being that sad, anyway, who will ever help me? love me?? why? because peoples tells me ( and for sure they does for you too, so why would you be there anyway) that im ugly, that i better go for a date with the ugliest, that im desespered case. but no. i would better be alone and proud of it than lone and sad with someone i dont like. i think that every's question here today is: why is ithqppening to me?! well, there is no answer to that, really... there will not be any help from around me (and you) and we all know that. now you can comment on my message, i dont think any will notice it anyway...

I thought I'm alone ... Well I think I'll die an old virgin...

if you a girl i think i can change that.....giggidy..still that easy just open up and say what yall wanna say yall.

I feel the same why I'm in high school and no one wants to go out with me I'm ugly and pointless. There is this girl named Sydney that I like in my 6th period class my friend said she likes me but she is always flirting with my friend and its just sad because I really like her but know she probably likes him owell I have no use to keep trying.

Hmmmmm.... I could say I understand... I've never been successful looking for it, ever. But love has fallen into my lap a few times, so technically I've been luckier than you. But... all of them were finding me to be of use somehow. My wife, she wanted escape from her previous relationship. That has been a major strain on us... and now at the end, it made the fatal blow to our marriage easy to land. Before her, my ex girlfriend, she was a rich kid who was just acting out a normal life, not really having one. I was little more than a plaything to keep her from getting bored in the end... So, maybe I've been a bit luckier, but I'm also in a lot of pain for having been so lucky. Don't feel too bad... right now I envy you having loneliness because you are simply alone... being lonely when you're supposed to be mated to someone who doesn't care about you... you don't want to go there, friend.

Trust me, you're not the only one. I see the same thing day in and day out. I am so flipping sick of being told that it will happen or that I will find a "good woman." I've been trying for 20 years, and I would have a better chance of stepping on the only landmine in Central Park.<br />
<br />
Women always say they want a good man, but I have yet to meet one who really means it. They always go for the "bad boy" who in the end will always hurt them one way or the other.<br />
<br />
A guy I went to high school with was the classic "bad boy," but he was never hurting for dates, hookups, or girlfriends. They never lasted, but he always had more. Eventually he ended up going to jail for six months for breaking a woman's arm during a fit of rage. For the record, I did not associate with him, but he was well known in town so what he was doing was not a secret.<br />
<br />
His next girlfriend was this woman who could not have weighed more than 90lbs soaking wet and probably just 5ft. tall. He was around 6'2 or 6'3 IIRC and built like a tank. Anyway, he beat her so badly that she ended up in the hospital for a month and he got sent to state prison for around 18 months on a plea bargain. When he got out, she was waiting for him. Less than six months later, he beat her to death. Thankfully he is now rotting in prison for the rest of his wretched life.<br />
<br />
For some reason, women in our current culture have been raised to go for the lowest common denominator when it comes to men. Perhaps it is what they see on TV and in the movies; I don't know.

Hah..hah..funny ..I like the ending ...I am sorry , for the part that the girl was beaten to death ... But .. THIS IS TRUE ..it happen here too.. This good looking man that I knew ...married to a sexy , out going girl in my small village ... then she left him for someone richer (I guess)... he begs her to come back..the best thing is she is expecting his child ...she ran off and after giving birth, asked for a divorce .. I think he's nearly mad ... At last he found happiness in a very simple, plain woman who wears a long headgear (cover up from head to toe) .. and they live happily ever after ......the end.. he..he..

love happiness and love. thats truly a motivating story

I agree, but I also come to you as a woman who only attracts the lowest common denominator. Then again, all of the decent ones are generally taken all the damn time.

there is a whole page of guys on here willing to make you happy even if just on the internet. me included in that number

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