Everyday Is A Lifetime

I dont know how ill feel when I wake up in the morning. Somedays I wake up ready to kick ***, live life and be happy .I look at myself in the mirrors somedays and I silently cry and resist the urge to break down. Sometimes I run away and I dont remember why. Somedays I feel worthless and empty, everything I say is meaningless. Somedays I feel so angry I can bearly restrain myself from destroying everything in sight. Every night when I go to bed, I relive my life in a day and pass out from the exaustion of my emotions, only dreading what tommorrow will be like. Im not allowed to cause a scene, so I wear a hard plastic mask of happiness. All I could do is complicate my life further. I want to beat the ignorant smug smiles off every conceited self absorbed human being on this planet, i want to reduce them to tears. But the next day, I realize I am the person I hate so much. Im against everything. Im for everything. I just... dont know.