I Do Not Know What To Do....I feel sad, lonely, misunderstood and realized the man I married and have two kids with does not love me.
He said I am only with you for the kids. I had two from a prior relationship and he expressed he no longer cares what they think of him. I have shown my distrusting side allot towards him. The last thing I did was record his conversation with his friend. And at the moment I am waiting for him to return home from a soccer game to tell me if he is leaving or staying.
He said I don`t deserve Love.
That I deserve to be treated badly that not even God would forgive me.
I only wish to be truly loved and seen as an important, special woman and human. His brother told me today that he left a girlfriend back in his country whom he truly loved. How should I feel to have so much thrown at me?
I`m scared to be alone with 4 kids to not have everything they deserve. A family.
We are all worth more than we can imagine. Sometimes we do things we regret later on in this life things we can never take back.
And the thought of him finding someone he will really love and to not have loved me torments me extremely.
I feel I have nothing to offer anyone else or even him.
Our relationship from the start was not pretty and the only reason we got married was because I got pregnant. We where in church and it seemed like the right thing to do.
Well four years later and this is what I thought I would never go thru