Afraid To Have Sex

well, me and my bf of a year have tried a few times to have sex. i want to have sex with him, i love him so much. we talked it out and decided we'd try but everytime his penis touches me and he starts to try and get inside i tense up, my legs slam shut, i shake, breathe heavily, get light headed and just panic. he's gotten so frustrated w/ me before, but we decided we were going to wait til marriage because i am obviously not married and he doesnt want to pressure me into anything that i'm not ready for (i thank God for such an amazing, understanding man.)

i have always been afraid of rape, and actually when i was 14 my 18 year old bf (now ex) tried to rape me. this could most definately be the reason behind my fear. at 18 years old i get the same panic attacks trying to insert a tampon as when i tried having sex.
i'm worried about still being afraid when i'm married... the thought brings me to tears...
girl420 girl420
18-21
1 Response Jul 12, 2010

I feel the same exact way! This is my first time knowing someone with the same problem as me! I'm afraid that i will always be a virgin, and i'm ready but when it comes down to it i tense up! I cry alot about this, because i don't know the reason for my actions, it's just i can't seem to relax enough to get it over with. All of friends are having sex, and actually have children, which i want someday, but i don't think i will have them because of being scared to have sex.