Petrified Of It. But Am I The One To Blame?I'm young. Really young. It's too early to start worrying about never finding your soulmate right?
I always thought I'd be in a lone term relationship by the time I'm 21 and then get married at 24. But there's something wrong with me... Not with my personality or with my looks... but with my feelings. I can't... fall in love with somebody. I broke up with one of my x's because he started talking about our children and the mere thought about that freaked me out. And my most previous one, I broke up with him because I was scared of losing my feelings for him in the future, that they weren't strong enough, and I'd just end up hurting him more.
I don't do flings or short term relationships. If I date someone, it's because I'm thinking about spending the rest of my life with them. But you're not supposed to think about that in the beginning right? And by doing so, I feel like I'm setting myself up for disaster. Because everytime I think about spending the rest of my life with someone, I freak out that I'm settling and that it may not be enough.
I'm too much of an idealistic. I have my head stuck in the clouds. I'm scared that I'm going to keep looking up there and not even realize my fairytale when it comes along.