Growing Up...

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Be Strong!
You have to be strong!
Don’t cry!
You are the oldest one, you should be strong!
Protect your little brother!
What do you mean a group of guys beat you up and your brother? Did you fight back? Why not? What do you mean they were to many? You should have fought back!
Be strong for me!
Don’t cry!
You are weak, you don’t have any confidence.
Be nice, be a good boy!
Why are you not like everyone else.
I have too many problems of my own, help me! Don’t bother me with your problems. Why are you afraid?

There are so many people in the world who don’t have it as easy as you do, why are you so down?
Look at him, he has so little yet he is doing so well. Why are you not like him?
Why are you so fat?
Why are you so stupid!
Average? No, you are not average! You were not meant to be average.

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What's my problem? I don’t have any problems, at all. I never have any problems.
I am strong! I don’t cry!
I will hang out with the thugs, it will make me strong!
Why did they run away? Why did they abandon me to be beaten up by the other group?
I want to get that mean look on my face that scares everyone and lets them know that I mean business.
I am toxic, anything that comes near me will shrivel and die! I am strong.
Can I drink this with a straight face? What are you talking about? I an drink the whole bottle with a straight face, you wuss!
Gimme that you wuss, I can smoke that, no problem!
See, I am just like you. I talk just like you. I have the same viewpoints as you. Why don’t you like me?
I am strong! I respect women. I am their protector. Women are to be respected. They will like me if I am nice to them.
I want to be superman, I can save everyone.
I am smart! I am not average! I am not stupid.
I have not slept in 3 days, I am smart, I can solve this.
What do you mean I deserve a C.
Sleep is for the weak. I am strong. Where are my caffeine pills.
Dating is for jocks. I am smart, strong and I respect women.
I really like her. She feels so nice. Why doesn’t she like me?
Good things will come if I am nice, strong and smart!
Everything will be ok in the end.
Look, these people have it so bad! Why cant you be happy with your life?

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Bad things don’t happen to good people.
It will go away.
I will have a satisfying life. I have been good and strong.
Something is wrong.
Something is wrong.
I should stop eating now or I will throw up.
Something is wrong.
The answers will come to me.
Where is the icecream?
I need bigger pants.
Physical pain is more bearable then the emotional pain.
This is a dream. I will wake up.
Damn! I never wanted to see an ER room. What do you mean I am under observation?
This only happens to other people.
The answers will come.
Why didn’t I find the answer at the end of the vodka bottle?
Yuck! This is not the answer, I must have smoked till the filter caught on fire.
Something is wrong.
Am I strong?

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I cant live like this!
I will not live for long if I live like this.
I want it to go away.
Why am I crying?
Make it go away.
Its not a dream. I am fully awake.
When did I start smoking again?
Why is this happening to me?
I am not strong! I am weak!
Do I look weak to other people?
Why can't I fall asleep? Will I feel better tomorrow morning?
I don’t want to wake up today?
Why didn’t she love me back?
She can see that I am weak.
I must be weak.
Why am I crying? I am too old to be crying.
Yea, I am weak, strong people don’t loose and regain 40 pounds.
Why can't I take a decision?
I have potential! I know it! Why can't I do something about it?
Will I be like this forever?

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I will fight to the bitter end. Fight the "bad guys"
My country needs me!
I will fight! I will fight for my country.
I will fight with a rifle or a pitch fork or a broke whiskey bottle!
Why am I so emotional? Why am I crying? Am I weak?
Why doesn’t she like me? She said I was a 'nice guy'!
Where is my big brother?
Why wasn’t he there?
Why didn’t I have a big brother?
I can't fight anymore!
I feel so weak!
I want to surrender!
Who will guide me? Give me the answers and protect me?
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frushax frushax
26-30, M
1 Response Mar 14, 2009

Thank you Lawlover!!! <br />
((((((((((((((Lawlover)))))))))))))<br />
<br />
Yea, I am not giving up, no yet atleast. I am working on trying to be the person I temperamentally am rather than what everyone else wants me to be. <br />
<br />
It feels good to have the brain clutter on one page. It gives me the ability to think about it more ob<x>jectively.