I Am My Own Black In America

 I love my skin.  It is Carmel brown, soft, smooth and silky. It is what defines me.  I had no choice when I came into this world to  be a "N", colored, black or African American.  But, I can chose how it defines me.  I chose not to be ghetto even if it was my zip code. I chose an education over welfare and babies. I chose not to marry a man for his money and a way out of my mama's house, just because i could.  i chose not to be some white's mans trophy wife even if he loved me for me.  I chose not to allow a black lawyer make me stand still, be quiet and look pretty in front of the partners of his law firms.  I left him at the door and moved on with my life because I am  a  FUNDAMENTAL WOMAN THATS ME!!!!!

I am proud of my skin.  i am proud of my culture.  I am proud of me.  i grew past that pretty little colored girl.  And became a Wonderful, open, loving, smart, kind, humble Black woman.  I am deserving of  love, human kindness and understanding despite my skin color. 

I ask that you open doors, because I am capable of doing the job not because of the the color of my skin.  I ask not to be judged or seen as a thief simply because i put on sweats and tennis shoes and a scrap on my head just to go  out and get a loaf of bread.  I ask that you get to know me first before you ask me about some rapper.  Cause I don't know their name.  I listen to country music that's me.   I ask that you not apologize to me for the past, for saying or calling someone the "N" word, your guilty for not standing up to racism.  I forgave you already.  I prefer an open and honest conversation about our differences so we can learn to live together.
And, if one more white girl who dates a black man, put some cornrows in her hair, larger hoop earrings in her ear, sagging pants, and tells me she is blacker then i am.  I will really Dial 1-800-choke-a-***.  That is not black.  I'm not being white.  Just finding my way in this life as a curvy, beautiful, black woman who loves red necks cause she is from the south, country music, high heels, saying sweetie and god bless your soul, yes/no sir/mam. reading a book, going to the museum,  talking about politic, etc.....

I am Black In America

misery22 misery22
36-40, F
4 Responses May 28, 2012

This is great! The more of your stories I read the more I want to get to know you. You write well. Your words are full of passion and express the widest range of emotions. They are at times very mysterious. You seem attractive from the inside out, and I have a vision of your carmel brown, soft, smooth and silky skin.

"I chose not to be some white's mans trophy wife even if he loved me for me."<br />
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I don't really understand this comment, but I love this post!

Thank you! I know the ghetto fabulous girls are the stereotype, but I'm glad to see you giving an excellent example of an awesome black woman that is beautiful on the outside AND inside!! It makes me sick when I meet an amazingly beautiful girl just to realize later after hearing her that she is completely hollow an rotten on the inside. Thank you for living your life on your terms, being honest, an giving a good example for all those other "girls" (not women) stuck in the ghetto stereotype an thinking it's desirable.

I grew up with many ghetto fabulous girls. They didn't see it as a sterotype but a life style. They spent their lives jumping from one drug dealer to the next, living in section 8 housing, standing in welfare lines and having any man baby that happens to live with them at the moment. It was a life, I could not embrae. Thank you.

Good for you and 10 out of 10 for haveing an opinion and putting a voice to it.<br />
You sound awsome and you know who you are and what you want. What more can a person ask for. I live in Africa and went to America about 29 yrs ago. I found the African Americans that I came into contact with to be most friendly. Skin colour is comming I hope a thing of the past where one judges you by what colour you are. After all we all come in different packages but it's how we are inside that counts. The condition of your heart and how you treat others. Have a great day.

Thank you for writing. I can only guess how great it was to be in Africa. I too hope that skin color will no longer be a standard of juding people in the world.