I Am Against Antidepressants

When I was adopted at age 10, I didn't bond quickly with my parents, I struggled with the transition, and I struggled to get good grades. My parents took me to a doctor who diagnosed me with ADD. I was started on a regimen of Adderall and Lexapro. For those that don't know, they often pair ADD or ADHD meds with an antidepressant to keep your emotions or whatever balanced bc Adderall has a tendency to create depression like symptoms, they give Lexapro or some other antidepressant to keep that from happening. Well I will say that my grades got better but I'm sure that had to do with acclimating and finally getting adjusted in my new home. But what got worse were my emotions. I often felt down, my parents and I would fight and I just felt like I couldn't breathe, like I was drowning and nothing was ever going to get better. I never tried to commit suicide but I can't say I didn't think of it. At 11-12 years old through 10th grade (when I went to a new foster home with parents that didn't agree with medicating) I often thought of suicide, feeling like I was never good enough and people wouldn't even miss me if I was gone. Twisted, and extreme, I know. But that's how I felt. I also would hurt myself. Cutting, digging my nails into my skin to keep from screaming in anger. I was never this person beforehand. Before I started taking these medications, I was not that kind of child. Coincidence? I don't think so.
jtpacp06 jtpacp06
22-25
1 Response Dec 14, 2012

Maybe it was the lack of meds in the new foster home, that caused the trouble. Also the difficulty with the acceptance of the new sheriff in town.