More On Gender RolesI briefly touched on this in my first post, but I would like to elaborate.
Feminism has resulted in a female gender role that is even less equal to the male role than it was before. Feminists fight for the right to be men. Women can wear pants, play on sports teams, and have careers. This, in-of-itself, is not a problem. The problem is that women and men both feel compelled to live the male role because it is superior.
If a girl dresses like a boy and plays sports, she is a tomboy. That is "cool." A guy wears a dress, he is a cross dresser and something to be laughed at. A woman becomes a CEO, that is admirable. A man chooses to stay home with the kids? While a few women may find that admirable, other men will laugh at him for being less of a man.
Anything a man does that is considered feminine is laughable or respected only by other women. Anything a women does that is considered masculine is admired by both sexes.
This applies to homosexuality as well. Selecting a male mate is part of the female gender role. Therefor, a man who selects a male mate is acting feminine and is laughed at. Have you noticed, in mass media how gay men are often comic characters while lesbians are tough and badass characters in action flicks?
Everyone wants to be a man. What's worse is that a biological male cant be too manly without offending the feminists, but a woman can be as manly as she wants. Sucks for the men. If they act like women, they are laughed at, act like men and suffer the wrath of the feminists.
We need both gender roles. I don't care the biological sex that fulfills either role. Idealizing one over the other has caused confusion and imbalance.
Ok, well, ideally we should all have equal right to either gender role and equal respect, but that comes with its own problems too. There were some standards that made life a bit more simple. Standards like, the man pays for dinner on a first date, or asks the girl to the dance. Now we get these awkward moments on first dates (as if they weren't awkward enough) when the check arrives. Blank stares and uncomfortable chuckles as each ponders what to do. The guy worries that he could offend the woman if he pays or if he doesn't pay. The woman may have no problem with they guy paying, but doesn't want to appear rude or greedy so what to do? Some of the assumed standards expected of males and females did make life run a bit smoother.
I think we could keep the standards without offending everyone. Let it be assumed that the guy will pay the first time. No need to be offended. Then, for future dates, talk to the guy in advance about it without acting offensive. Too many feathers get ruffled over following default traditions. People need to chill out.
CypressMoon 26-30, F 5 Responses 4 May 21, 2012