How To Dissapear Completely (radiohead Song)

                  I was dreaming about a particular girl for the umpteenth time, imagining we were doing anything together. At some point while imagining my "creepy" fictional life, I began to introspectively look at my reality. "Is there a girl who dreams about being with me?"     I wish I could say yes. Who would want to be with a 27yr who not only hasn't had sex, or a girlfriend but hasn't even kissed a girl?
                I have no self-confidence but I don't understand how I could when all I know is rejection. I'm so badly to be with someone, someone to hold, love and tell how I'm feeling and do the same in return. I just want to know what it feels like. I saw couple leaving convenience store, she was driving him, while he was yelling "...just f***ing drive b**ch!!". It sucks realizing that women would rather be with a guy like than me. It maes me realize how pathetic  I really am.
                All this made me think of this radiohead song " That there,  That's not me,.....I'm not here, This isn't happening, I'm not here, I'm not here". This song gives me hope that this isn't my reality but a nightmare that  I'll wake from soon.
TiredOonnee TiredOonnee
26-30, M
2 Responses Jul 12, 2010

i want somebody like you

i hope u will meet her some day, be yourself, every person has his own way, u dont have to look at others. yes many couples are unhappy but they are togather, i think 99 percents arent so happy but prefere to be with some one than alone and close their eyes in the truth or sometimes pretend as they dont hear bad things or dont know what is better not to know. when u see couples not always it means that they are happy. i think very few are happy for long time...unfortunately not for all God gives such a present