Breaking Glass

I want to run... I want to scream... I want to
be free

What is it that makes me feel like I deserve this?
Am I afraid that I won't know HOW to be happy?
Maybe I stay here, because I fear I won't find you there...

Am I insane?
I say I can't be because I am highly functional.. but I ask
Am I loved?
I say I don't feel like it, despite what you say.
Is it because of you, that I shut down?
Is this abuse?
Is this manipulation?
Is this how you treat the one you love?
It is, but you don't...

What is it that WOULD make me happy?
Smoking a cigarette?
No... but I will do it again and tell myself it's the last one

Where would I go?
What about her? Would she forgive me when she grows?
Would she understand why.... I had to leave?

Is this a story?
Can a story be just questions?
Maybe... but there are a few answers right?

Am I following the rules?
Are there any rules?
Do I care if there are rules and if I am following them or breaking them?
Yes... I do care.
I want to break them
Just like glass

LongLost LongLost
31-35, M
Aug 6, 2010