What's Bad About Being " Good "

People think that human compassion is one of the most beautiful things in the world. It is scarce. It is heartwarming. But the gain is almost always one-sided. Isn't that how altruism is defined? Why is altruism praised like some relic from a lost civilization? When you think about it, it seems unrealistic. How can a person be altruistic? Don't you gain from doing good things for other people? You can't tell me that warm fuzzy feeling in your stomach isn't a gain. It's an old debate.

Even then, not all altruists get that "good feeling." It just comes so intrinsically, so naturally, that you don't know what's happened until you've given up one of your most prized possessions to a child who didn't have something to play with.

In a socially competitive world, altruism fails.

Evolution means that we are in some way "all in this together" but at the same time we live to survive.

Why do we see more people kill to get to their share of the insurance money than to protect someone about to be killed?

We argue, we fight fire with explosives, we make threats, we create ways to get people to back off. We want to scare people. Too close is too close. An animal about to be attacked will try to ward off its predator. It's safer to keep your distance and keep yourself away from harm than to let your guard down and let an opponent overtake you.

The difference between the average person and an altruist is that a regular person can set a goal and reach it without being affected. If he or she sets his or her mind to it, s/he can get his/her goal without doing much damage. To an altruist, any damage done is amplified. You take a job from someone who might deserve it less but NEEDS it more - devastating. You hurt someone intentionally to get ahead without even earning your gain - lethal.

No one wants to be the hare. The hare is smug, confident, hateable. The tortoise is modest, with an attitude that says Let The Best Animal With Weirdly Human Characteristics Win. You want to be the tortoise, calm, cool, but with a goal. When you are an altruist and you see the hare napping, you stop. 'It's not fair. This is a race and he is not racing. I should wake him.'

Why is it easier to get a person to hate you than to love you? Altruism just isn't practical. Love is beautiful but you become vulnerable. You believe that anyone can be good. A person sees that and sidesteps around your securities. A manipulative person can spot altruism from a mile away. "More for me." "Better for me." "Sucks for you."

An altruist can't do that. I can't cheat. I can't use someone. I can't bother someone. I can't manipulate someone. I can never be the lead singer, I can only do backup vocals. I can never put myself first. I can never go out of my way to do something good for myself unless it can help somebody else. In a life-threatening situation, don't worry, I will have your back. I don't have to know your name or the number of times you pushed me away or told me some variation of "F you."

I will give up all my luxuries if it will make someone feel better. I used to hide behind the excuse, "I love to make people laugh. I love to make them smile." I then realized that I sometimes went to STUPID lengths to accomplish this. Not only have I done things "out of the way" to help someone, but sometimes in my quest to help someone else I completely forget about myself. More than once I have helped someone with a heavy homework assignment deep into the night. Forfeiting to sleep, my own assignment was left incomplete. But grades don't matter to me. I don't know what does. People? Their feelings?

Recently I have discovered this is my ultimate weakness.

I am a victim of my compassion. I am an altruist, nature's carpet.
theroadtohello theroadtohello
18-21, F
1 Response Aug 2, 2010

theroadtohello<br />
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i love you for who you are. I am blessed to meet your soul