Life Ends..........new Life Starts...............

The begininning was way back when I was about ten years old.........and I was in the car with my family on vacation.  We had a really bad car accident.  As a ten year old............I didn't realize or know / feel that anything was wrong after the accicdent. 

Fast forward 25 yrs.  My wife and I are about to move into our brand new house we had built.  My neck had hurt badly for the last 25 years.    But when we were in the middle of moving...............my hands and fingers are on fire!  At least thats how it feels.  The strength is gone from my hands and arms. The year 2004.

The whirl wind begins.  We end up see a doctor in our new town.  She seems very concerned........................I'm sent for x-rays.  The next morning the doctor calls and says......................"she wants to admit me to the hospital.................because that will make it faster to get an MRI. 

The MRI goes by..........................and then life really sucks.  My spinal cord is being pinched by my vertabra.  

Long story short...............I have one vertabra removed, and 5 disks removed.............A cage inserted to replace the vertabra, a plate and six screws inserted in the front of my neck.  Three rods and 10 more screws inserted in the back of my neck...............which finally included a Halo Brace. 

The extent of the surgeries is much more detailed than I'm writing about.  The first surgery last 11 1/2 hrs.........I ended up having three surgeries..........................just to give you an idea about what we dealt with.

I just about died from a blood clot after the first surgery.  I got lucky.  I'm still here.  A blood clot closed off my airway.  I woke up on a Ventilator.  Waking up on a Ventilator is not much fun.  It was 2am the day after my first surgery that I woke up and felt that something was wrong. 

I struggled with this for the next 4 yrs.  I've been in Therapy now for about a year regarding my PTSD (Post Tramatic Stress Disorder).  For years..........I'd wake up at 2am feeling like my throat was being crushed, and that I couldn't breath.  I'd feel the same way almost hourly every day. 

I started Therapy last year (2008).  I can finally sleep.  I used to wake up in a panic at 2am every morning....................the same time the blood clot closed off my airway.  I'd have panic attacks nearly every hour of every day over the last 4 yrs, feeling like I couldn't breath.   Not a good feeling.   I used to call my wife at work nearly every hour.................just trying to make it though the next panic attack...............that I couldn't breath. 

She was there that night in the hospital when I had the blood clot.  To this day.................I still say she saved my life.............................

Fast forward, another year................2009.  I know I'm not giving nearly the details this story needs.............but.....................thats ok....................................

I had ankle surgery this last Jan. 2009.  Although I didn't feel scared about the surgery..................my body remembered.  My blood pressure shot up and my body temp. shot up.............................all just because I was in the bed getting ready for surgery. 

I've been looking for a site to share stories and experiences for a long time.................without going into any other detail.........................................I could go on for days......................................this is my story.

Someday, I will need more neck surgery................

Well, life has moved on as it always does.  It is 6/02/10 now.  I'm still going  to need more neck surgery.  Its been a strange ride these last 6 or so years.

Many times I see things before they happen.  Like a dear running in front of my car.  I see it  in my mind before it actually happens.    Its really strange.  It seems to happen  every day or two with something.  Its like Deja Vu to the max.

 

kevinbonato kevinbonato
41-45, M
Mar 11, 2009