Right Now, I'm About To Explode

About four months ago, my best friend's boyfriend of 8 months broke up with her. I was the first one she told, and the one to console her for the next couple months. I spent countless hours talking to her, going over her house, anything I could do to help her get over her ex, and during this process, I ended up falling in love with her. I had to tell her one night because she was suspicious and I couldn't take talking about how she still had feelings for her ex boyfriend any more and the result was awful. Our entire friendship wasn't the same for weeks until we finally decided that it was stupid that are friendship changed, and that was the day before I left for college.
Now after over a month of talking every single day and still having feelings for her, she tells me that her ex boyfriend told her he has feelings for her again. If one thing can possibly ruin our friendship it is this. I thought everything was perfect but now I am 200 miles away from the situation and feel totally helpless. I can't handle talking about him with her, that would kill me on the inside; and if I told her that I couldn't talk to her about it, it would makes things worse because I'm the one person that she goes to for everything and if she found out that I still have feelings for her it could repeat the cycle all over again. If they don't end up dating again, things will be mostly ok, but I don't know how to handle it until she decides. I have no idea what to say or whether or not I can tell her about my feelings.
I am desperate for advice.
ls01388650 ls01388650
1 Response Sep 20, 2012

Hi friend,
Hopefully this advice reaches you on time. I too was recently in a similar position. Mine was slightly different but sort of the same. I think when it comes to this type of situation you have to go on thinking : "More is Less and Less is More". What I mean is this: Listen to her problems but only give her 10-20% of the attention you use to give her. Make her work for your attention and be true to yourself. Please don't be her personal doormat where she only comes to you because her shoes are dirty. If you don't feel like talking about her dumb *** boyfriend then tell her! You dont want to hear any of that crap. Would you talk to your friend about how crappy a movie is over and over again? Please don't punish yourself and have some self respect.