Problems With An Al-anon Member Who Talks Waaaay Too Much!

So, I started attending al-anon in February of 2012. It took me awhile to become comfortable enough to share my stories/thoughts with the group, but when I finally reached that point, It felt great. I felt like I had been missing out on this years ago. I now have a place to vent, and share with people who are similar to me. These people felt like close friends who supported and watched over me. In August 2012, I left town for college. Online I found one al-anon weekly group to go to that fit well into my schedule with classes along with everything else going on. The ladies at this group are also nice and supportive. BUT there are things I do not like about this meeting, and it drives me crazy. It annoys me. We go in..say the 12 steps, serenity prayer, then we just start talking about our week.
At my other group, we would read a page from one of the books and comment on it. We each had our own page.. Things were orderly. Things were comfortable. After a few meetings at my new al-anon goup, I thought maybe I could adjust to it. It's been awful tough though. Out of the many members in the group, there is one lady who always takes up about 10-15 min. of talking time. I feel like that's selfish..I want to have my say in how things are going. I've been waiting all week for this meeting! Not only that, but it seems like she says the same things over and over again! My first problem with her was that she would always start the meetings with talking about something negative..For example, (Bob from across the street died this week, don't go to the club, someone got shot, etc. etc..) At one point, she spent the majority of the meeting talking about a man, who I guess she knew at one point, had his heart burst. She then tried to explain how it happens. That was the last straw, I kindly asked in the middle of her conversation "Can we please change the subject?" I feel like it caught her offguard, but we then did.
Things are still the same way.

My ideal al-anon meeting would be one where I can work the program with others by answering 12 step worksheets, talking about the 12 steps and so on.
This lady is nice to me..so I feel very bad for saying all of this, but it drives me crazy :(

What do I do? She's been here longer than me, and I think she might have even started the meeting herself.
An Ep User An EP User
2 Responses Jan 11, 2013

Are maybe have a group conscience and say how you feel to everyone see if anyone else feels the same point out the importance and the other meetings ;) good luck

I just recently started going to Al-Anon. The first group I tried was not for me. All the people were in their 60s and married to alcoholics. I'm in my 40s and raised by emotionally and mentally abusive parents who were not alcoholics. The people were all negative and didn't understand or practice the slogans or steps very well. So I tried a group in the city - so much better. A mix of people and ages. Positive vibe. We read from the Al-Anon literature and have a subject to talk on, etc. I'm not sure if there is anything you can do other than to find a different meeting.