Empty

my husband left  for basic at ft Jackson 1-20-09, some days it is easier then others. today not so easy. i miss him.....so much it hurts. we have a 3 month old who looks exactly like him, sometime i just cry. i never knew what love was until i met john. i can completely be myself with him and never have to worry. we are very lucky though because we have gotten to talked on the phone alto. but sometimes id rather talk through letters, dint get me wrong i love hearing his voice, but then when we hang up I'm depressed. i think about him, i worry, mostly about him getting deployed, i know it will happen and i dint know how i will deal with it. i miss him. i miss falling asleep in his arms, waking up to him kissing me on my for head, i miss the stupid things we would argue about and i would be wrong 90 % of the time but he would still let me win the argument. i was standing up rocking the baby earlier and our song came on and i just closed my eyes and imagined him here and the tears were pouring down my face. 33 more days and i get to see him graduate, then he is gone for another 5 weeks. i have heard so many horror stories about husbands coming home from training and getting deployed a month later. my husband is in field artillery (13 bravo) so i know the probability of him getting deployed is large. i just miss him. i feel empty without him

StacyDevitt StacyDevitt
22-25, F
3 Responses Feb 26, 2009

aaawww sweetie, you'll be ok! It was never said to be easy, but you will survive!<br />
I preach to everyone about strength here...it's the one thing that you CAN count and something that your husband is going to look for from you. <br />
I know you miss him, and you don't know what to do with yourself, but there is an inner strength in you that you need to find and thrive on.....it will make your days and nights without him a tad bit easier! I promise! Find that inner strength, find out what it is that keeps you going in the first place and grow from there!<br />
I'm here if you ever need a shoulder or an ear!

I'm sorry you feel like that. I'm having a really hard time right now as well. I don't have any advice for you unfortunately. I'm trying to find things to do to keep occupied so I don't keep getting so worked up. I guess you just need to keep busy and stay positive that you'll be together soon

I feel the same way. When matt left for bct i felt like half my brain left.. I forgot everything and everything was like ten times harder. Then he graduated and went to AIT and he was sent to Korea. I've not been able to live with him for 14 months. i will not be able to live with him again until August. I'm terrified that they will station him at a deploying post and get deployed a couple months after we get settled in. <br />
Try to hang in there. Don't let the fear or sadness get to you. It's paralyzing and thats not good when you have a baby to take care of.