Preachers Daughter

Unfortunately I grew up with not one but two priests for parents in an episcopal church. Having religion forced down my throat caused me to lose any respect for it. Which is how I became an atheist. Now I feel scared that someday they will find out.
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14 Responses Feb 9, 2013

You will be stronger now that you lived through it though.

You could try sounding them out... tell them you met someone at school who says they're an atheist, see how they react to that.

Even if they see through it, it gives you both plausible deniability -- if they're unwilling to accept their daughter is an atheist, then you've given them the option of pretending that you never said anything of the sort. At the same time, they'll be more prepared for it when you eventually do come out with it.

Just wondering, it kind of sounds like advising you to be dishonest, but maybe if they are unwilling to accept the truth then it'd help to tell them something that fits better in their worldview -- like, you're "disillusioned with the church and want a more personal relationship with God" or something. Again, seems a bit like lying, but if it's a white lie that helps you have a good relationship with your parents it might not be the worst thing.

Grew up in a similar environment - but it wasn't until I decided to make my own choices rather than react to the environment around me that I knew what I wanted. Sometimes hard to see the wood when the trees are hitting you over the head.... :)

That seems to happen a lot. i hope that you find what you believe and are confident in it.

They need to know so that you can explain to them the the absurdity of the nonsense that were abusing you with. It is tantamount to child abuse to threaten children with the possibility of eternal suffering simply for being human. Humans do not require religion in order to be moral.

Another comment said "Don't let your rebellion control your judgment and faith!". What does faith mean? What does this person mean essentially? Don't let your ability to think rationally control your ability to follow doctrine without questioning it....ever is the message that I read.

just be yourself - the best person you can be

we are same

Believe to your heart...

It may be best to not say anything about your atheism. It will of course come out at some point, but hopefully not in a way that will hurt your parents too much. My experience is that religious people, especially the very religious, really can't understand not believing in god or religion. So trying to get them to see your perspective may be impossible.

You could also prepare your self to accept a certain amount of aggression, something you will have to deal with, and not reflect that aggression back. You will have to show that there is goodness without god. Fear will keep you off balance, so become fearless.

You do not have to tell them anything if you do not want too. Depending how financially dependent you are, I would hold back before saying anything that may really upset them. Not that you won't get kicked out in the street, but speaking from experience, you can't really hold your own in an argument with two uber religious parents who keep a roof over your head because they will rub it in when they can't come up with anything else to say. <br />
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Keep researching and reading up on all aspects, including atheism. Through the veil of lies, the truth shines through.

Why is it a secret. My religious mother and brother love to argue with me about religion. They always lose, but, no one gets angry.

consider honesty, if they really understand the concept of love they won't freak out too bad

<p>Bella - this is your father,... and I already know...</P>

I'm in a similar place, all my friends still think I'm a Christian..But i haven't been for almost a year now..

Well if it's any encouragement i think there is a lot of good stuff in the taking care of the poor, and feeding the hungry, loving your enemies. focus on that stuff! it's at least useful for life!

Yeah, it would never occur to anyone to help the poor or have morality without the bible. And the people who wrote the bible were wrong when they said love your enemies.

No one was talking to you, if you want to have a debate about faith and morality feel free to message me.