People Dont Really Understand
Hi, I was born into the religion,my "so called christian father" was a fanatic.I was never allowed to go out with other JW'z koz it was worldly and most of the others gave up inviting me because they knew i wasn't allowed to go, an I felt so alone.He would study the daily text which lasted 1 hour,like a public talk.Every family problem that occured he would go to the elders for help,we r talkin minor things that didnt involve thr religon.When I turned 11yrz he arranged for a elder to study with me,which I didnt want to do but got forced to.Each time this elder came around for the study, he would shut the door an start hugging an kissing me.He said that no one would believe me if i told anyone. Adding to that, at school I was gang raped but couldnt tell anyone not even my parents,they would blame me.My parents always said why cant you be like 'that sister she's so spiritual' not like you.When i was 14 I left school an found work an refused to go to meetings,I done so many things that would make my parents mad,smoking,drinking,going out to clubs and wearing short skirts just to **** em off,of what they put me threw.
During my adult years I couldnt keep my demons from my past an try'd killing myself lots of time but they always bought me back to life.Each day I live I battle thoughts of killing myself,I no longer talk to my parents. I would like to meet ex JW an hear there story an how they cope.