Trying To Start Over!

I have been a cutter since the age 11 I am 19 now and as of November 2012 is when I finally quit. I started cutting because i was raped by someone close to me. Cutting helped a lot. I had this thing in my head that was telling me if he hurt my why shouldn't I hurt myself. I have never really talked about my rape or my problem until now. I told my mom but she didn't understand. I have been dealing with this alone for far to long. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about cutting it was like a drug to me. When ever I cut it was like a high to me every problem I had went away. It was my way of dealing with everything in my life but am ready to try and put this behind me but it is so hard to do so. I don't want to keep living my life like this my body is full of scars and I am sick of lying to everyone around me about why I don't wear shorts and why I like to wear hoodies all of the time.
Thanks for letting me share my story with all of you.
panther93 panther93
18-21, F
Feb 11, 2013