I Am An Ex, But Do Think Bout It!

it was wen i was 15, and i didn't stop till i was 17 and a half, i did it nearly everyday. people may think you're stupid or be disgusted. but really wen you go through things cutters and ex cutters do and the things or people that cause keep bring it back you'd understand.

i started because just after my 15 birthday my parents started to part and try to stay away from each other, but then my dad would stay out all night after work and spend time with his brothers, his family never did like my mum.

so wen it was my 16 birthday every 1 was ok, and i thought it was over, till the next day wen my dad came home and they was arguing at the end of the drive and my mum called me out side just so would hear them saying everything, 2 weeks later, my mum took an overdose and drove off and was gone for nearly 10 hours.

7 weeks after she found out she had cancer, when it all started i had to be an adult i wasn't allowed out or to talk to my friends and out of the whole 2  and a half yrs i went to school 2-3 times a week. cause they didnt want me round any 1 but them.

but now that i have stopped things arent all that better but i dont do it anymore.

lonelyemogirl lonelyemogirl
18-21, F
1 Response Feb 15, 2010

yea, things arent better for me either. i just have more resolve not to, even though i am tempted and come close to relapsing sometimes. i just remind myself im not actually making it any better. there is a temporary relief but the regret and backlash isnt worth it. besides i want to develop my coping skills more without having to resort to hurting myself, and probly am not sending myself a good message if i hurt myself.<br />
it sucks your parents were/are like that. it sounds like they have a lot of problems and expect(ed) you to take them on as your own. i hope you've gained some independence from them since then, because you dont deserve to have to deal with their ****. although its hard when you care about them too. just remember to look after yourself. <3