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I Married An Intj.

I married an INTJ. For 12 1/2 years we've made our life together. I gave my everything to him as an INFJ would. He took it all and figured out how to use it for his own good, as an INTJ could. There were good times and many laughs. Love and light and happiness. There were also dark, dark times and many tears.

The intuition and feeling of being set up was, of course, on target. Yet, I found a way to ignore it all and continue on with love and devotion. I confronted him for injustices toward the children or toward me. Then questioned this love and devotion of mine. Was he really the one I loved? Or was it the idea of who I thought he was? Who I imagined myself to be when I was with him? That remarkable once in awhile feeling that no one could be as loved as me. Then ignoring and disregarding me would soon follow. How could I fit into this robotic scheme? Holding out for a morsel of affection while enduring his darkness and hate.

I asked his forgiveness when I allowed the anger to boil over. Comforted him and supported him. Attempted to advise and help him as he had asked me so many times to do.

He loved me and us at various times through the years. But his darkness overwhelmed his light. He took it all in and drowned out what bit of emotional connection his builders had allowed....and then he left. He left.

Now here I am. Abandoned and free....anxious anticipation, exhilaration, sadness, anger, hurt and pain. Life is pain. My name is Kumari Elizabeth and I am addicted to pleasure and pain. I have quit and survived worse than this.
kumarielizabeth kumarielizabeth 31-35, F 2 Responses Jan 13, 2013

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wow, thanks for sharing. this makes me second think my INTJ "friend" who I thought was rather cruel in her ways of speaking about certain things and not sensitive enough to understand other people. no patience whatsoever especially regarding intellectual things and often jumped to conclusion about other people's intelligence (which backfires on them sometimes), and rather selfish and cold.

thank you for sharing.

could you explain more about what you mean when you write "being set up"?

Well, I found out that he had been talking about me behind my back. Saying things to others that he never said to me -in fact the opposite of everything he said to me. Basically he's a two faced liar. He plotted and planned to leave me at the most convenient time for him.