Newbie a Bit Confused

So, I'm an INFJ. I've felt the outcast for some time, and overthinking it to death. Besides being in a 1% personality group I'm also schizophrenic, which is, coincidentially, 1% of the human population. But, I'm an 'odd' schiz in that I have it together pretty well as long as I take my meds and I always take my meds.

It occurred to me many times over the years(I'm 55 y.o.)that I have a mental illness due to my sensitivity to other people and the chaos that is this world as we know it. I keep to myself as much as I can because I pick up on so much crap out there. My husband and I get along great, he's also introverted though an INSJ.

To give an idea of my sensitivity, about 10 years ago a friend of a friend passed away. My friend was very broken up about her death. I gave him a comforting hug and immediately my body hurt where he had touched me and I was in a state of grief and confusion. This lasted until early the next day. I'm very careful now who I touch.

It's said  we don't like injustices and/or to see others hurt, so sometimes I'll rant at the TV after a news story I find disturbing. Of course I know no one save my husband can hear what I'm saying, I just do it to blow off steam. Please tell me some of you do it, too?


sikotik sikotik
4 Responses Mar 20, 2009

I'm INFJ type too, and my uncle and my grandmother have schizophrenia. Knowing that and knowing that in some traditional cultures schizophrenics were considered as being psychics/shamans experiencing an expanded state of awareness instead of being considered ill, I wonder if there is any connection between INFJ personality and schizophrenia/shamanism? I have some quite uncommon psychic abilities, too.

I've never had a physical sensation from a person's emotions, but I do pick them up without even trying. I have seen someone walking away and asked, "What's wrong with ___?" Turns out she had a miscarriage. I just felt it. Sometimes I know what people are thinking, too, but usually it's just the sensitivity to emotional nuances. That's probably why I have to take medication for depression for the rest of my life. What a gift/curse!

I rant at the t.v. often. :) It does feel good to blow off steam. I had a teacher last year that described the skin on her arms as burning/hurting when she watched the news, it sounds similiar to what you said about hugging your friend. (I don't know my teacher's type.) I usually avoid the news, it makes my heart hurt. Just remember that 1% of a big number is still a big number, we're never completely alone. :) Peace.

I hate watching the news!!<br />
I'm a psych nurse and have dealt with some schizo's that are really, really sick.. It's awful. Good for you for taking care of yourself.<br />
May I suggest you write a book? <br />
I think it would be an amazing thing for anyone, even doctors to read. You could explain things like the story you related here and give the world a glimpse into your world. As many will never know what goes on in the mind of a schizophrenic. <br />
Keep writing and god bless