Courthouse Wedding Because We're Introverts

Our marriage plan... no ceremony, no frou frou glamour girl stuff from Bride Magazine and it's going to be at the courthouse... just me, my spouse to be, and our parents. no exceptions.

It's funny the moment when others (like 40 others) in the family hear the gossip of our marriage, they immediately assume that a) we're going to have a huge engagement party. b) the ceremony will be held at some chapel or a romantic coast line c) everyone is invited d) I have to wear a doggone wedding dress e) that my lover proposed to me in a way that was staged, the overly romanticized Holly wood kinda proposal. The women want the gushy details.  Yeah right... and thats supposed to be the norm and the proper way of doing a marriage? dream on! I'm young-ish but not your typical frou frou kinda gal who only talks about makeup, trends, shopping and celebrity gossip. I'm reserved, unconventional and might I add... introverted in an extrovert's society? possibly even seen as down right weird .

Then their jaws drop the moment I announce the wedding plans, plain and simple.. it's going to be held at a courthouse.

I understand their surprise and logic.. I mean, a courthouse wedding sounds unromantic to this materialistic bride, big wedding and party, perfect bridal gown society, but hey, an expensive wedding isn't what matters damit. It's the relationship and long term commitment to eachother that does. A wedding ceremony IMO is overrated... the exhausting details of minutae-- the matching flower girls dresses, drinks, menu, cake flavor, dj and gulp... having 40 plus people watch you for the whole day.Nothing but relaxing or intimate. Why not just go to a courthouse, snap pics, eat a delicious meal, come home and try my home made tiramisu wedding day and call it a day so my to be husband and I can go for a bike ride later. :)

Do any of you get what I mean? I am interested if you have a similar experience?  we only want the parents there.. no siblings etc. What is the most tactful way to send the message, "please leave the rest of the large family-- this includes the siblings. just the parents"?  

smartiecats smartiecats
26-30
2 Responses Mar 5, 2010

I understand why you don't want to show off to everyone who knows you and your partner. A good friend of mine had a small intimate ceremony. Just parents, siblings and a handfull of closest friends. Total 20 people. They invited who they wanted and explained to them why they wanted such a small wedding. <br />
They didn't seriously offend anyone.

Itz nOt essential fOllOw the rythm Of sOciety,u can dO thins in a way yOu feel cOmfOrtable unless yOur lover suppOrts yOu,i can understand yOu are really having a tOughf time,but yOu need tO have patience patience patience..thts all what came tO my mind.GOD be with yOu,best wishes