Post

Hurt To The Core...

I have two daughter's one that is 23 and the youngest being 18 soon to be 19.  I have been divorced from their father for years and remarried to a wonderful man for 12 years who feels as if they are his own.  My youngest moved back in with her father and his girlfriend because she wants to come and go as she pleases since she is an adult now (no rules).

Her father let her move in with them but will not help her at all financially and his girlfriend has made it obvious she does not want her there.  This has been the case for a long time.  We have always supported both of the girls financially and emotionally.  My oldest daughter has two kids of her own now 5 and 3 years old our grandchildren who we adore.  We love to take care of them when we can work permitting, take them places & generally spoil them rotten. 

Last night my youngest daughter graduated from High School and of course we had bought all her graduation needs because her father did not have any money and couldn't help her out.  His girlfriend did not attend the graduation and when it was time to greet our daughter after the ceremony her father and his sister grabbed her diploma (we did not even get to see it) and all of her gifts.  Think this is bad huh.... when we all went to dinner afterwards my oldest daughter had to pay for his meal because again... he didn't have any money and we paid for everyone else.  

Went online today and my oldest daughter posted the graduation pictures on her Facebook album and all the pictures were of her sister, herself and her father and the other family members that had attended.  There were no picutures with us nor were there any traces of us as if we didn't exist.  Sometimes I think I shouldn't feel this way but it hurts.  This is just one episode and I could go on and on as the list is endless.  I have told them before the way I feel and it doesn't do any good.  I have even said no when they need help and told them they will have to ask their father thinking this would possibly open their eyes but it never does.  Really sad......      

  
              
nayray123 nayray123 41-45 8 Responses May 29, 2010

Your Response

Cancel

I think your kids will get it one day. I did. I went to sub-saharan Africa and witnessed the value the people i lived with put on family. I also witnessed families that couldn't afford to feed themselves properly. Everything i saw there made me appreciate family a lot more.<br />
<br />
There is a season within the rainy season called 'the dying season'. Malaria is most prevalent then because of the hot and humid climate and perfect breeding conditions. Many people die during this time. Many grandmothers, mothers, fathers, brothers, little brothers, baby daughters....<br />
<br />
Perhaps your children need to better understand what we have here in America, and how difficult it is to provide for your family. I believe then they will begin to understand what you go through to provide for them and take care of them, and they will appreciate how lucky they are to be healthy, happy individuals.

Whats the use of such kids who don't appreciate their mother....<br />
but feel that their hopeless father is better compared than a caring mother..<br />
<br />
i feel soooo bad for you..<br />
your kids are so rude to you and u still care soooo much for them,,,,,<br />
<br />
DON'T LOVE BUT AT LEAST APPRECIATE YOUR WORK AND EFFORTS.....<br />
<br />
i would say forget such kids<br />
now they are not bothered about you but when some work will be there. they will roam around you<br />
how much you run behind a person that much far he'll run from you..........<br />
<br />
your present husband is so good than spend quality time with him<br />
forget all worries<br />
<br />
one day for sure your kids will come back to you and will give you the same affection which you always desired for.....<br />
<br />
i am sorry for have written anything which have hurt you. but i just couldn't hold my anger

Whats the use of such kids who don't appreciate their mother....<br />
but feel that their hopeless father is better compared than a caring mother..<br />
<br />
i feel soooo bad for you..<br />
your kids are so rude to you and u still care soooo much for them,,,,,<br />
<br />
DON'T LOVE BUT AT LEAST APPRECIATE YOUR WORK AND EFFORTS.....<br />
<br />
i would say forget such kids<br />
now they are not bothered about you but when some work will be there. they will roam around you<br />
how much you run behind a person that much far he'll run from you..........<br />
<br />
your present husband is so good than spend quality time with him<br />
forget all worries<br />
<br />
one day for sure your kids will come back to you and will give you the same affection which you always desired for.....<br />
<br />
i am sorry for have written anything which have hurt you. but i just couldn't hold my anger

i aint no mom cause im the son and i guess your right. i mean if they dont appreciate you and their old enough to be on their own then i think you should just kick them out.

I feel sad for you because I can completely relate to how you feel. Although my story is somewhat different and I may share it sometime...it all boils down to the fact that I've been so hurt just as you are. We do so much for our kids and yet we're punished for all we've done. In saying that, I've noticed that the person who does less is more appreciated than the caring, loving mothers that we are. Maybe, just maybe we have done too much and are taken forgranted...It's time to stop the enabling. Take care!

Omg, omg , omg omg omg!!!<br />
Did i just WRITE THIS????????????!!!!!????????<br />
<br />
God, this truly does go on everywhere, doesnt it!!????? OH MY GOD!!!!<br />
<br />
This is so so so much my story i can not EVEN begin as the diamonds flow down my cheeks , unchecked. ONLY.. do this twice, baby.<br />
Now though my daughters are starting to realize that momma did everything for them and daddy is a louse although my two younger ones (different dad) 12 years apart almost like yours...same thing. They WORSHIP their no good dad and his family, post pix of everyone but MY FAMILY on FB. Kinda tells ya something though, doesnt it?? It simply tells you that they have robbed these kids of their self esteem to the point they are SCARED to do anything against his threatening CONTROL!!! Think about it!!! Werent you scared of the monster? Why did you leave the control freak??

Thank you to all the mom's out there like both of you who work day in and day out to support us. Who are always there when we need them even when we don't know how to ask for help. And who put up with our crap and still love us no matter what. Please don't be discouraged. You are champions.

You SHOULD feel that way, and you have every right!!. I have a son who does not appreciate me either. All i'm doing is waiting until he 'grows' up and realizes how much he's taken me for granted...'tis a bitter and long journey.<br />
yes...........very sad